While strolling through the courtyards Harper saw a small crowd of familiar facing just hanging out. She  didn’t know if it was out of guilt or if she just had to get something off her mind. These were her comrades accustomed to the same lifestyle and she strikes up a conversation.

It’s not easy to be a woman in our line of work.  Just like in corporate society you have to work twice as hard to prove yourself.   But once you have gained that respect we work twice as hard to keep it.  I would like to share a little story with you.

Life was good and I felt I had to take the necessary steps to keep it that way.  My hired protections were doing a fine job but felt I needed just a little extra.  I was tired of spending money on bribes.  After some discussion with a confidant I followed up with his suggestion, I acquired a Corrupt Agent.

We hit it off from the start. I made a mint reselling drugs at the severely discounted prices he obtained. The cuts from his drug seizures was sweet.  Can’t count the number of times his connections at work kept my ass out of jail.

Shit couldn’t be going better when I found out that he was in deep shit with the department. Not only was he going down but he was going to take me down with him.  Not only myself but my whole organization was in jeopardy.    Again consulting my trusted confidant this was something I had to handle myself.  This mission was too important to leave in the hands of someone else no matter how much I trusted them.

The trap was easy to set up.  I knew he couldn’t resist a little brown sugar. Harper had to smile to herself. But all joking aside this was a very intense ordeal.  Although my plan had work precisely as I had planned when it came to the actual point where I had to pull the trigger I hesitated.  This was so final. Dead is dead. No coming back.  Then the bitch inside me came alive.  If this man lives I might as well be dead, he has so much on me.  I can’t live in fear. The gun with the silencer I had planted was in the perfect position. I placed it at his head and I pulled the trigger.

 The nervous anxiety was finally over.   I cased the place to make sure everything was left in order. I slowly shut the hotel door went to the hall phone and I dialed my cleaner.  Now I had to live with it.

Bloodshed is the way of life here. Let’s talk about it.

Killing someone is some serious shit isn’t it?

Have you ever taken someone’s life?

Do you think you will be able to pull the trigger?

 Under what circumstances will you kill someone?

Would you disobey and order to kill?

Harper waits hoping to hear from the others.

Bishop looked at the lady, spilling her guts about a murder. Lucky there weren't any uniforms nearby. It was pretty common-place that people knew suits ran these streets and underground talk was normal. Puffing on a cigarette, he listened to her story and smiled as the questions berated those around. He tossed his cigarette to the ground and spoke up.

"Bloodshed. It be somethin' fer sure. Most everyone remembers their first, I assume. I know I do."

He stuffed another cigarette into his mouth, lighting it up before continuing.

"First man I kill't, been in Ireland. I was fightin' with tha army there, been an English lad. Me squad been tasked with clearin' one o' them's posts. We done our research, an' it been me night fer watch. We were gonna take 'em out in tha wee marnin', just before daybreak, but somethin' been goin' on. I roosted tha lads an' we moved on them to see what tha commotion been about."

Bishop puffed on his cigarette a few times, and blew a nice cloud over his head.

"Turns out, they'd received intel on me an' tha boys, an' were plannin' a strike o' their own. Lucky we caught 'em early. I missed every shot I took, but me boys cleared them crown bastards out. Then they drag one forward ta me, an' tell me ta shoot 'em dead. I been a wee lad, sixteen at tha time. No matter ta them. They wanted ta know me loyalty. No decency in them lads, they put the man on 'is knockers an' held 'im there, waitin'..."

He took another drag of the cigarette.

"Took me a good bit, standin' there, holdin' me piece to tha lad's head. He been cryin', he didn'ae want ta die. Wanted ta go home, or even join with us. Anythin' but a stiff. I took me a deep breath an' squeezed slowly until 'is blood been on all o' us. He slumped quickly ta tha ground, tha rest o' tha night been a blur. Drinkin', celebratin'... Tha's what me boys done. I sat in tha corner an' drunk'd meself stupid tryin' ta wash me eyes o' tha sight. I'll never forget. Lad couldn'ae been older than meself."

Another drag on the cigarette.

"So ta answer yer questions, lass. Tá, killin' someone be some shite. It stain's yer soul. An' Tá, I kill't before, so I be able ta pull the trigger. At this point in life, there be many reasons I would kill someone. Been through a lo' o' shite meself, an' it don' bother me so much nae'more. Disobeyin' a direct order in tha army meant death. At that time, nil. I wouldn'ae disobey. Now, I might at least think fer more than two seconds about it. R'ally depends on tha situation ta be honest."

He gave Harper a smile as he finished his cigarette.

"Don'ae fill remorse lass, ya done what ya had ta do fer yer survival. Saol fada chugat, long life ta you."