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Nov 24 - 00:20:10
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Easy Money Started by: Conn on Jan 07, '17 19:38
"What the fuck is taking them so long?" mumbled Conn to himself, looking at his watch. It wasn't a complicated mission. They had to get in, get the cash, and get out. Oddly, his partners, Axel and Fate where taking a very long time.

Not long ago, the three of them where drinking at a pub nearby, having a good time. On his way to take a piss, Conn heard a little something about a rival gang successfully robbing a bank, and that they where now rolling in money. Conn came forgetting about his need to let go and explained the situation to his friends. "They're rolling in money! All you need to do is get in and grab some money on the floor, you know, the ones they are rolling in!"

And that's how Conn was standing in the defected building, across the street, holding his sniper, ready to shoot at members of the gang who appeared in his sight. He hadn't heard anything up until now, so he was hoping his friends weren't in trouble.

Before they came here, Conn had suggested to Axel and Fate that they study the Ninja Skills guy from the mischief brothers. It had worked perfectly for him when he robbed the bank, so he didn't see why it wouldn't work out for them either. Yes they had less time than him to study the ventripotent ninja, but it was better than nothing.

He took out his pack of smokes, really annoyed to be the lookout, but it was the role that best fitted his abilities. He had a very good shot, and poor physical abilities. "Fuck I need to piss so bad." he mumbled, a cigarette in his mouth. He walked over to the far corner of the room he was at, and urinated, with a pleased look on his face. It just felt so good.

Suddenly, he heard a shot come from the gangs HQ, and he ran for his gun, not even taking the time to lift his pants up. He layed down, keeping his gun pointed at the front door, wondering what the hell was going on inside.
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The sound of the gunshot covered the sound of Fate's entry. Seeing Conn on the floor, she dips down and low crawls to his position, flattening out on her stomach next to him. One shouldn't sneak up on armed people, even unintentionally, but she knew he'd know it was her. And sure enough, he didn't so much as flinch when she settled in next to him. She had no idea how he'd acquired abilities like that, surely it couldn't be learned from a comic book. She'd been about halfway through the first edition of the one he'd given her when the dog that had taken up residence in her apartment had decided to eat it.

Reaching over and taking the cigarette from his mouth, she takes a drag from it and replaces it. Exhaling, she whispers. "Where's Axel? Damn, what's that smell?"

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Axel was late again. It was starting to become a habit for this guy. He sometimes felt like he was in two minds or thoughts at once, or like he was in multiple running storylines. Then he remembered this was reality, and to stop reading those fuckn comics Jules sold. He enjoyed a good read, especially that ninja one, with the ninja, and stuff.

He couldn't remember the comic exactly, as after receiving his homework from Conn, one of the whores from Arizona Club, in Vegas, just a hop skip and a flight away for a bit of tit even if you're one of them gays, had used it as a self pleasuring device. That's right, she read the fuckn thing. And enjoyed the shit out of it. Pleasure had.

But this meant Axel was a little clueless to what ninja skills actually meant, and arriving late on the scene he was even more clueless to where he was suppose to be. His recent abuse of alcohol meant he wasn't his usually before-this-recent-abuse on point self. He ended up outside the building the other two were in and across the road, getting ready to bust into another building.

Axel decided to leave Betty back at that famous whore house in Vegas everyone was talking about. She sat behind the bar, with Felipe and his mostly empty pockets. He was dark though, so the bitches loved him, in St Louis. What he did bring though was a tool he hadn't used in a while, his hand axe. Not many knew this, but his name was a play on his actual real name Alex, and what he use to use to fuck a sinner up.

Although not reading the comic book entirely, he did get the idea to use stealth. So with axe in hand, Axel readied himself to kick in the front door. He remembered something about Conn being the lookout guy and watching their backs across the way. And given his tardiness, he also figured Fate was already inside. Before he could bust in to join the party, he heard the sound of a bullet which had him roll out of sight and dive into a bush.

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Honestly... Was this really the place? Sairia had been tipped off that this place might be a good one to scope out and hit... But so far she hadn't seen much that suggested that this were true. She did hear that this gang had just come across quite a haul and that she could very possibly lift some of that money for her family... Although she still had her concerns. What if this was a test? Or worse, a set up... Well Sairia would be ready for either scenario. At least she hoped she would.

As night fell, Sairia found herself in the alley beside this place in question. It didn't look like anything special... Although that could be where the best stuff was hidden... Right under their noses. She sighed before steeling herself for the task at hand. Sneak in, relieve them of some of their funds, sneak back out. Simple right? And then if she managed to get herself caught, in theory she could talk her way out. There had been very few situations that this wasn't the case.

Her heart racing, Sairia moved toward the side window that she had figured would be a good way in. Yet little did she know, she wasn't alone. Crouching on the window sill, jimmying the window open, she hissed a soft victory before sliding through the small opening. Just then a loud shot rang out and she yelped involuntarily before diving out of sight to hide. Oh great... Already not good... But she'd stay put for now listening intently and trying to plan out her next move.
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Conn knew the person that entered the door was Fate, no one else knew he was here. "He was there, holding an axe.... not to sure why..." he whispered to her, hoping she would know. "Anyways, come, he should need our help inside" he said, wanting a piece of the action.

He ran down the stairs and joined his friend, waiting for Fate to join them. "Why the fuck do you have an axe? Take this instead." he hissed, handing him over one of his two pistols. "When she arrives, we go in and out. We need to be careful, I saw a shadowy figure get inside, a woman I think." he whispered, making sure his pistol was full.

He was feeling quite nervous, only because a situation like this had never happened in the comics. He wasn't too sure about how it was going to go down, but he hoped all three of would make it out alive.
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Fate catches up to the two men, and after a relatively simple plan is hashed out, she offers to come in through the side, where the shadow was seen earlier. Hunched over, she hustles over to the window, which is conveniently still wide open. After a pause spent listening for any movement, she hears nothing and pops up onto the windowsill and slides through it, landing ungracefully on the huddled figure below. Scrambling backwards, she draws her gun, and the other woman follows suit. A weird little standoff ensues until Fate breaks the silence.

"Uh. You want in?" she whispers. The guys would be pissed, but she'd happily split her third with this girl if she promised not to shoot her in the face.

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After a brief moment of silence, Axel removed himself from the bush and brushed off the dirt on his suit pants. He noticed a small tear, and although he was upset, he knew he'd be seeing his tailor later that week so all was good. Be waited a little, nearly ready to kick in the door again when a hand grabbed him on the shoulder. It was Conn and Fate. About fuckn time, he thought.

"Where were you guys? I've been here for like a solid fifteen minutes already." Axel said in a low tone, and not at all convincingly.

Axel loved his axe, nearly as much as Betty. But he saw it as more a male tool, and wasn't really one to love the tool of the masculine variety as much as the feminine. Even so, he'd rather keep it than use a pistol. That, and he had nowhere to put the fuckn thing. So in response to Conn's offer, he simply refused with a polite gesture then moved close to the door. He still wanted to kick it in like he read in another detective comic at Pulp Fiction Comics in Vegas.

Axel readied himself whilst Fate ducked away to the side. When he heard voices inside he went into action, kicking at the door with his roughed up labourer boots he wore just for the occasion. After throwing a ton of weight behind the kick, he failed to do anything but fuck up his ankle. He winced in pain as he leaned against the building for support, also taking pressure off his foot. He looked at Conn and shrugged.

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Well it seemed Sairia didn't choose the most brilliant place to hide after all. It never occurred to her that someone might come through the window after her! Then again she didn't realize she wasn't alone and that the threat could possibly come from outside the place she was trying to rob! Well either way, she crouched low beneath the window, watching through the gloomy darkness to see just what would come out after her. Oh please don't let it be a dog... Just not a dog. Then again as far as she knew, dogs didn't fire guns... Did they? Ah well a musing for another time.

Well listening and watching ahead of you didn't typically help when death came from above! Something, or perhaps someone, came right through the opening she had made and carelessly left open but pulled a similar manuever to her own. This ended in the pair of people in a heap underneath the window. Sairia was terrified! But she fought to keep her head in this unexpected situation and after a mild scuffle, they disentangled and sprang away from eachother like two warring felines. Sairia was quick, pistol coming to her hand and aimed quickly at the other intruder, yet in kind, the crouched little red head was also staring down the barrel of a gun. Her pulse raced and mind came to a screeching halt. Did she fire first and ask questions after? Did she let the woman explain herself? Just who was trespassing on who's turf? Well if one got technical, they were both trespassing... But that was besides the point! In any case, Sairia hesitated... Mistake? Probably... It would likely get her shot someday.

Thankfully that day was not today. Neither of the women got shot by the other yet while they were facing off, the other woman spoke. Did she want in? Well actually she wanted to rob the place alone, bit judging by the loud thunk on the door, the woman wasn't alone. Sairia jumped and looked around before looking back to the woman. Sairia didn't think she lookd too phased, maybe a little surprised by the sound... So it was highly likely to Sairia that this woman wasn't alone.

She gave a firm nod, determination lighting her eyes. "I want in.". She confirmed softly but firmly. Sometimes one had to go with the flow in this business. So once that was established, Sairia crept to the door that had been assaulted, gun at the ready. She kept her eye upon the mobster behind her. She was under no misunderstanding. This could be a trap and she wasn't about to get popped in the back of the head because she was stupid. She drew in her breath quickly counting down silently in her head. 3... 2... 1... Thank goodness for simple locks because she threw the deadbolt, unlocked the door, opened it quickly and had her gun barrel up and in someones face before they had time to take another breath. Her eyes flew wide at just who she saw. "Conn?" She hissed in surprise. She hadn't seen him in a while but she didn't expect him to be here! And a guy with an axe? Oh gosh now what...
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Conn giggled at Axel's attempt to open the door, the brushed him off confidently.

"This is how you do it..." he said, knowing very well that if his wasn't able, his tiny noodle sized arms weren't up for the job. He let go a quick prayer and ran for the door, stopping dead in his tracks as the door opened and gun was pointed to his face.

"It's not me it's all him!" he exclaimed himself, pointing at his friend, who seemed quite disappointed with his answer. "Sairia!? What are you doing here?" he added recognizing the young lady who held his life between her finger. She lowered the gun and Conn turned around, articulating the word "Sorry" to his friend, or ex-friend, he wasn't sure anymore.

"Well we are pretty fucking lucky we haven't been discovered yet. I suggest we divide ourselves to look for the money, then meet in the room I was in at first." he advanced, hoping the others would agree. "Boys VS Girls.... let's go!" he yelled a little too loudly, caught in the competition. He heard footsteps coming their way and grabbed the axe mans arm, running up the huge staircase.
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Doing a double take at Axel's...ax...Fate shrugged her shoulders and addressed the cute redhead. "I guess they've got the second floor, then. Shall we search the first? "At her affirmative nod, they race quickly to the back of the warehouse, splitting off in different directions. Fate goes left, running up to a storage room and listening at the threshold and then squatting down to peer through the keyhole, searching for voices or light. Finding it empty, she holsters her gun and enters, ransacking the place in an effort to find the money, or a hint as to where it could be. Cardboard boxes were pulled off of shelves, cabinets and drawers had their contents dumped on the floor. 

The room was empty; all she'd found was dust, cobwebs, and mouse droppings.

Crap.

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Axel felt everyone was admiring his sexy axe. He knew it by the odd looks at the handaxe dangling from his right hand. Either they were looking right at it, or he had a bulge in his pants he didn't want to have to explain. He went with the axe. Not perturbed by their admiration and jealousy, as he interpreted the situation, he gave a wink to no-one in particular and before he knew it he was being dragged along by the guy who moments ago was throwing him under the bus.

What could he do though? Use the axe on the guy who set this whole thing up? That probably wouldn't work. Nay, it would work very fuckn well as Axel was very skilled at close armed axe combat. But nay, he couldn't be that cruel. So he hobbled along, trying not to put too much pressure on his right foot. Once up the stairs they were met with a hallway that had two rooms on either side of it and a door at the very end.

Axel quickly pulled his arm away from Conn, not wanting to hold hands longer than the five second rule. The earlier sound of footsteps kicked off again, and it sounded like it was coming from behind the door at the very end of the hallway.

"Conn!" Axel said as forcefully yet quietly as possible, trying to catch his attention. But it was not to be, as the end door's doorhandle began to flutter. Not wanting go get busted, Axel pushed Conn toward one door as he himself flew toward the other. A quick turn of the handle, a duck and enter, and a swift yet quiet closing of the door and Axel was now inside with his back against the closed door, eyeing the room.

It was dark, yet little bits of light from the hallway were peering in under the door so he could make out the room just a little. It was a closet. A mop and bucket were close at hand and various cleaning products, like Lysol, were also about on the single shelf against the wall. Nothing noteworthy. Axel kept his position as he waited to see what transpired out in the hallway, and wondering what the hell happened to not-taking the-fall guy.

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Sairia was so lost in all of this. Her going with the flow attitude was going great for staying alive, but it was growing abundantly clear that she was no longer in control of the situation... At all. It was also quickly clear that she had just about put some lead into one of the people that she dared call Friend. Her eyes widened as he returned her name and she trembled all over briefly below lowering her gun. "I'm so sorry... I didn't know who it was... What are you doing here?!" It was very clear that they were all here for the same purpose and Conn's group was bigger than hers... Meaning her alone. So better to join them as she doubted she could overpower or outwit all of them.

So Conn was in charge and in a very excited manner, he called out the challenge before dashing off with the other man in his group. She looked to the lady of whose name she didn't know. But at her offer of an idea, Sairia nodded almost too eagerly before taking off at her side. They would check the lower floor. Oh goodness she hoped that she had figured correctly and that no one was home. But was that too much to hope for? Ah well one just had to wait and see!

Sairia took off quietly before veering right, heading right into another warehouse room. Just more boxes and cabinets. Naturally she would give the room similar treatment, going through it quickly in her search. But she too was coming up empty handed and making far too much noise no matter how quiet she tried to stay.
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Conn got pushed by his friend, or partner he didn't really know anymore. He rolled into the room and quickly closed the door, exactly like Ninja Skills would've done. He laid down on his back, relaxing a little, before realizing there where a bunch of blood thirsty mafiosos staring at him. He took out his two guns, Messie and Bessie, and fired blindly at his opponents. Still firing , he crossed the room and jumped behind a night table to calmly think off a strategy. He took a little peak at his assailants and counted five of them, plus the one in the back, who seemed to be taking a bath in his paper money.

With a concerned look on his face, he did the best thing he could think off. "AXEL! AAAAXEL!!!" he yelled out the top of his lungs. He exchanged a couple of bullets with the bulky bodyguards, without any success. It was taking an oddly long time for his bud to show, which confirmed his worst fear, Lysol. The only thing that could keep the feared Axel away for this long was a little bottle of pure delights. He hoped that his bud got over his Lysol addiction so they could grab all that bath money and crush the girls.
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Hearing the shots fired upstairs, Fate returns to the ground floor open area, nearly running headlong into Sairia. They exchange a silent, knowing look and bolt up the staircase, guns drawn. Fate has waaaay too much momentum going at the top, though, and has to drop to her knees in a long, carpet burn slide to the legs and ass as she flies into the money room, looking really cool by accident as she fires into three assailants before coming to a halt in the middle of the room. Two thugs take hits to the head and the third is winged in the arm, dropping his gun. Fate reaches over to snatch it and slides it backwards, hard, out the open doorway she's careened through, in the vain hope that Axel might pick the fucking thing up and do something productive with it, rather than running in here with his ax like Farmer Brown looking for a chicken.

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Like farmer brown looking for a chicken to roast for a celebratory bro's before hoe's dinner, Axel kind of burst through the door holding his hand axe. Some may have thought him crazy, but who would've thought Conn, being the avid comic book reader of The Alleged Adventures of Shadow and Ninja Skills would've been the least stealthy of them all. Still, Axel was confident his combat hardened weapon of choice was the right one.

As he half paced through the doorway with his injured ankle, a gun slid under his right foot causing that leg to slide put from beneath him. Before he could say 'winner winner chicken dinner' his legs separated into a retarded ballerina split move. His axe flung from his hand as he tried to correct the impossible manoeuvre, eventually stretching way too much for any man. He grabbed his nuts and rolled around on the ground as the axe smashed into the head of one of the mobsters, imbedding itself into his skull.

Four down, two to go.. was the motto and most likely the next chapter in the comic series of 'When Mobsters Attack'.

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Sairia was growing more and more frustrated with each passing moment. The longer it took them to find the blasted money, the more likely they were to be discovered! And it would, for sure, be a bad thing to be discovered. She really wasn't the most well versed in this criminal act thing, but boy if she wasn't learning and learning fast! Well soon enough the room she searched through was pretty well ransacked and she came up empty handed. She sighed but decided to call it quits on this room and was just starting to head out of the room when she heard gunfire. Crap! Well her first instinct was to hit the deck. But then she remembered that she too was armed. As she hastened her steps, she almost collided with the lovely Fate, but both ladies stopped short of a rather disastrous collision. With a soft huff in silent agreement, Sairia tore up the stairs.

She was a tad more careful than Fate as she ran in. She kept her feet, casting a quick glance around the room. Many were dropped almost instantly by Fate, but her eyes caught movement from at least two. Exactly two shots rang out from the barrel of Sairias gun. One hit one mobster in the leg, causing him to drop, clutching said leg. The other was heading for the money bather. It seemed he had decided to join the party and had gone for his gun. Well her shot was aimed, strangely enough at his gun. Aim being fairly good from all the practice she had been getting in at the shooting range, she hit his gun, causing him to, out of surprise, fire his own gun... Right at his own foot. One should never jump with your finger on the trigger.

Sairia had never been one to shoot to kill... But to incapacitate... That was another story entirely. She took up a defensive position at Fates back, watching the door as well as looking to Conn for further instructions. Now wait a second, how did both the boys end up on the floor?
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Conn looked at Axel with a confused look. "You didn't read the comics did you..." he said, squinting his eyes in disappointment. The girls where pretty carrying the ship right now, but the contest wasn't done yet. He winked at the two lovely ladies and jolted out of his hiding place, grabbing Axels axe due to his lack of bullets. Using a one-two-three do-re-mi combo he learned at music school, the last mobster was taken down.

A quick dash to the bath tub and he was the lucky winner of the competition, under the amused eye of the two women and look of pain of his partners. "HAHA! I won, I won!" he said, a bit too happily. While he dancing his dance and walking his walk, he didn't notice the wounded bathing man had managed to get back.

He soon saw the stars, after a hard hit on the back of the head.
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Out of ammo, Fate sees the bathtub guy rearing back to strike Conn, who's oblivious and doing some sort of happy dance. From her position on her skinned knees, she throws her gun at the guy, aiming for his head. Hit his head she does, but it's the wrong guy. Conn sinks to the floor like a sack of potatoes.

"Well, crap." She says, defeated. 

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"Fuuuuuuck!" Axel blurred out, still rolling around in pain.

If he didn't feel he'd been given the male equivalent of contraception, a swift kick to the family jewels, he'd probably have noticed a bit more happening. But all he could think was how much he wanted to give whoever left the gun there a nut punch in return. Crack the sack of whichever cat had him wincing on his back.

Since he had other things on his mind, like no sex for a week, he didn't notice there was still one guy left to handle. With everyone else basically sorted, it was now up to Sairia.

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