AfroSamurai looked toward the people gathered before him. When he had advertised the reading he hadn't expected so many people to show up, so he was kinda grateful he'd bribed the police to stay away for the evening. He was very eager to share the information which he had uncovered; he had gone to great lengths and paid vast amounts of money to get his hands on it. He put his hand in his pocket, and pulled out a tatty looking journal. From a distance it looked like something a beggar would keep; something of little or no value and certainly not anything worth a second look. Those standing right at the front cause glimpses of something shiny and metallic on the front of the journal as he fumbled with it, being careful not to damage it. Afro held the book up to the audience, front cover forward where those with good eyes could read the words 'Book of the Gods' inscribed into the front and inlaid around the words was a beautiful tribal pattern which appeared in gold and silver colours.

"This, my friends, is as you can see - The book of the Gods. The content of which speaks for itself. I shall read now."


With that Afro lowered the book, carefully opened the front cover and began to read..

"Once upon a time, there was a God named Squishus-Validus. He keeps watch over human-kind, ensuring that our world runs smoothly and they didn't encounter any problems interacting with their environment. There are other gods too; Tiggius-Mightius - who kills off those poor people who are schizophrenic, Helpus-Deskus - who answers everybody's prayers, Almighty-Anubis - who shatters worlds (on a regular basis, so I've heard), Enkindlus-Silentium - who nobody has ever seen or even heard of, they say he is silent as the shadows. There are some that say the man that walks the streets cleaning the trash is a God, but what do they know?

Today's story focusses on Squishus-Validus. Of all the Gods he was the least experienced with women, so was the one that most wanted to find one. In all his glorious wisdom he decided to possess a human body so that he may experience a woman's touch, and learn as much as he could about women. Unfortunately, in all his wisdom, his first choice of human to possess was none other than the serial jail-rapist Bubba.

Of course with being a God in human form, Squishus-Validus' first move was to escape from jail (only after realising that the 'women' he had been chatting up in jail for the past few days were in fact men in wigs). However after a few days of trawling bars and social places, he found himself looking at men more than women and decided that all those years in jail must've done permanent damage to poor Bubba's brain. So with that, Squishus-Validus took Bubba's body back to jail, and left him laying in his "girl"friends bed.

After a few micro-seconds of pondering (yes, he is that fast women) - he decided to create a body which he could shape in just the way he wanted. It would be attracted to women, attractive to women and of course in male form. With this new body he was going to find himself a woman and treat her to the best time of her life. Or so he thought."


Afro slowly closed the book and looked upon everyones faces. Feeling satisfied, and fairly parched he decides to end the story there - for now at least.

"My friends, my time grows short and my throat grows dry. For today the story is finished, to continue another evening."

Afro carefully places the journal back in his pocket and wanders away, leaving the crowd whispering, talking and exclaiming between themselves.

Advantage jumps to his RH's side

This is a tremendous find Afro!   The information you hold here is very valuable to understanding why things are the way they are today.  I look forward to hearing more about our Gods.

With a firm handshake, Advantage leaves Afro's side for others to step in

As Afro wanders away, Crazy Nine is left with much curiosity about stories from the other gods and about Squishus-Validus's tales of his other possessions.

Kismet stood in the street listening to Afro and all started to become clear. The last few days he had been acting odd, almost crazy, blurting out half sentences about Gods, rhyming strange names and repeating, '...it's so shiny...', Kismet thought he was acting like a man possessed! As she wandered towards the nearest bar, she pondered the meaning of this 'Book of the Gods' and wanted to hear more about it.

You know this is pretty decent, then again I love sweet baby jesus stories from the bible ! you know there is nothing wrong with having some faith in the Lord Jesus !

san clears his throat and nods...

"this guy certainly has the potential to bring some important teachings to the masses, he certainly held my attention.

we all need a little guidance every once in a while."

shivanok standing with a dumb shock look and he said

i can't say anything, what a great story of the god, well i can't wait for the next lesson to begin

want to here about the Tiggius-mightius, and almighty-anubis

C.P. tunes into Afro's speech and forgets the world around her.

That's some interesting stuff you got there my friend. I know you said you paid alot of money to get that journal in your hands but you do make me curious of the "great lengths" you took to get this :P

She pulls out a tissue from her pocket.

But anyways, that was a great story Afro. I just feel bad for Bubba though!

C.P. uses to the tissue to whipe a tear from her sparkling eye.

Nujabes scratched his head as he pondered the tales of Squishus-Validus. Surprised at the findings, he began to space in and out - realizing what was on the way, he quickly grabbed one of the blue vials that were hidden in his coat pocket before insufflating the contents inside before releasing a relieved sigh. Stepping up to AfroSamurai, he decided to pitch his own idea towards the next chapter.


"That was a fantastic find, my friend. However, might I recommend that you cover the rarer God known as Hermitus Marious? One of the more undocumented Gods, as, legend has it, after working on the sixth day, he disappears for two hundred and seventy seven or more to his cave only to reappear again for another proverbial week of lobbying and maintenance to the Eight Cities.

M walks across the street, and listens to the conversation.

"Ah, yes. The book of Andolini. I beleive it is the 3rd of the 7 books of Sicalia. Contrary to popular belief, the man who cleans up the streets is not a god, but a demi-god. Squishus-Validus may have trouble with women, but Anubis never did"

M reaches into his jacket and takes out a vial of pain-killers. Ahh, much better. He then sits down and awaits the stoy to continue.

Wow, nicely done. Never new biblical history could be so interesting, will defiantly be looking forward to the next story!

Wonder if Squishus-Validus ever solved his problem, too bad I wasn’t around could have pointed him the direction of the best prostitute rings around! I mean erm…. So ive heard about them anyway…

Mr_Furley, looking amazed from the history lesson he just took in, removes his Dobbs hat and scratches his head

That was heavy Afro, I can't wait for the next chapter.

Mr_Furley thinking to himself, especially on weed.

Apologies to all those who were awaiting my next reading, I seem to have misplaced the book. Fear not though, I'm sure it'll turn up soon.

He nods at you in that way that you know he knows who took the book, and he will get it back no matter what he has to do.

Fear not, I shall return.

Afro turns and walks off down a dark alleyway