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Sorry not Sorry Started by: Tiger-Lady on Apr 01, '17 14:39

I always thought these were kind've lame but here I am doing one anyway. Some things just should be said; I'm sure there will be trolls but it doesn't matter much at this point to me. This is not one of those “I’m quitting forever and leaving the game!” posts because I don’t feel that way at all. I’ve had an amazing time on this run and I have no hard feelings.

However, I have been told that I will basically never be able to fully play this game again. Not anytime soon at least. I have been told I will be bloodlined and never allowed to grow very big. I wanted to go down fighting and not die in my sleep which is what was likely to happen. And if that means I can never play the game this hard again then so be it. There's more important things in life. I’ll be around; even if I never reach this point again.

I'm sure all sorts of lies will be spewed and the way they try to explain these events will be shifted to make Mousey and I seem like the bad guys. And to some people, a lot of people maybe, we are the bad guys. So be it. Ultimately, Fitz took a drunken shot at one of my closest friends for nothing more than shits and giggles. Not too long ago Grin killed a ranking member of a family in his own city simply because she mugged him. It was clear that they knew no boundaries. A week or so ago LV ordered their first "purge" and we were already being told of more purges to come. God forbid you live too long or you're a new bloodline with no one to vouch for you or you were connected in the past to the wrong people.

This was to keep us "safe" they said. But LV didn't have to make the same purges. They didn't have to kill the same number of people. They let known rogues live long and open lives when we were forced to kill our own friends or fear death ourselves. I was warned not to try to save too many people because “Curtis wouldn’t like that.” I was told if I pushed back too hard I would be killed. Yesterday I was told rather clearly that Revan’s death was supposed to happen in two weeks, when PH and DT would have both been wiped. Revan was never supposed to reach GF I was told. They were nothing more then "purge cities." I was also told that I would not be far behind. My connection was never to Curtis or Fitz or Grin. I didn't know them before this run. My connection to Las Vegas was through people they work with, a group that has shown that they use people and then toss them aside when they're suddenly no longer of use to them. A group who's leader last night decided that he was going to "wash his hands" of me because I was emotional over the death of a friend, a person he considered useless. Without his protection it was rather clear that myself and Mousey would be killed quickly.

Watching my district die was one of the hardest things I’ve done but watching how nearly every single one of them jumped in to help, through shooting, proing, organizing, etc. made me incredibly proud. They too wanted to fight to the death. What’s the point of building a gun if you die before you get to use it?

Iocaste and SadPanda, you guys were the lion and bear to my tiger. Kate, my beautiful Kate, you were an amazing right hand and support – even when you would steal my hats. Aldora, you have so much potential and I hope to see you in more uppers positions in the future. You learned so quickly and did so well, I only wish I had lived long enough to give you your own crew. DK, I know you were upset at the end but having you in my crew was a pleasure and I had a lot of fun getting to know you. Ewiv, my ever dependable Proer, came through as always. Roy, you were the newest in my crew but you stayed with me until the end and did everything you could. I won’t forget that.

House of Stark, don’t think I forgot you guys. Brant, my other half, you’ve been with me since the start and in the end, we went down just how you wanted, guns blazing. Fuck the haters, right? <3 Floyd, you shined as Right Hand and helped lead that crew to success. You were my very first Made Man and I’ll never regret that decision. Chucky, we didn’t talk as much as I would’ve liked but I knew I could always count on you. Pinkerton, don’t get discouraged. You learned so quickly and did so well. I always enjoyed your questions, even though sometimes even I didn’t have the answer. Butch, you keep building. I’m sorry you didn’t get your cap killer but you will get there one day. Crowley, A_Dbz_Gif, Aloy, Albino, Drunky, and the countless others that helped pro or shoot at their proers, you will forever have my loyalty.

I do not and will not regret for a moment the choice that I made. I failed in killing Curtis but Mousey and I made a huge dent that will take time to recover from. Hopefully it will slow or stop the purges for now and the rest of NY will remain untouched. I vowed I would not shoot a member of New York even if they shot at me and I stood by that vow. I hope that I’ve bought you a little more time because despite them denying it, there are enough people in NY that Curtis dislikes and wanted to see dead, including a now CL and several hands.

Borkers, you took me in and gave me a chance even after I messed up. My biggest regret has been and will always be not telling Lynchy about LV’s plans to kill him so we could’ve wiped them then and there. Reggie, I centered this text just for you. I hope to see more RegMan in the future, though I'm sad there won't be more stories of PoisonDani. Do me a favor and give me an epic death scene ok? Sat, your writing has inspired me this entire run. I’m sad that the potato has stopped and I hope there are future additions. Thank you for your help on the docs. To the other Uppers, it was a pleasure and I’m sorry that it ended this way.

And finally, Revan. I made you a promise and I did my best to keep that promise. Fitz is dead. You have supported me through some of my worse moments and without you I would not be playing this game.

I know there will be hate and people will dispute many parts of what I've written. That's ok, it's just the way of things.

<3 Daniella

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Can't fault you for your actions.

 

I'd expect you to realize why we all rallied behind our respective teams.

 

Hell of a fight girly. Was an exceptional amount of fun. (Even if I didn't get Don AGAIN :<)

 

Go have a break. You fucking earned it. Ya did good <3

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Thank you for pointing out what we all knew was happening, Curtis will have his day like everyone does, until then I stand with you Daniella, I will not put effort into the game, spend money or perhaps we all should just take a break and let the ones left turn on each other, which will happen, just a matter of time, It will hit Izzy the most in the wallet when people get tired of the Tyrant, and choose not to spend money on the game that does not allow new players to get anywhere, Such a shame!

Well time for a break from here as well, Happy Spring get out and enjoy life and let the tyrants have their game. Good luck to those still standing, may the odds ever be in your favor! 

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I myself have spent a fare a mount of money in this game and still end up getting nowhere. When people catch on it’s always the same bloodlines that run this game maybe they will stop spending there money too! So Izzy if things change feel free to email me and I might spend money again. You know my email ;)

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Look on the bright side. Insanely Well Dead is quite an achievement in itself.

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If you have been told you can't play again because you fought back on a roleplaying game, that's a joke and should be looked into. 

Not surprising from a group of individuals that look to systematically kill people that aren't mates with Curtis (or sometimes even are) after they hit a certain age. 

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Been saying this for a while now...sadly it is easier to get a label than for people to realise and accept what is the reality. It is well known both in and out of the game that this is the case.

I do hope at some point the powers that be might see this as limiting to the possibilities of the game and expansion and future participation than rely on those well named group of friends that might line pockets short term but do not add game value long term.

If it is a group wishing to run a game all of the time all I would say is make that clear so people can make informed choices. Those of us that have been around long enough are already I believe. It is the newbies I feel sorry for. I guess we must all have our journey to work things out.

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Eh stopped reading after " you were connected in the past to the wrong people. " - Yeah... about that? Heh.

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Telkin no need to be a Whiney bitch always. You've never amounted to anything in game, and most certainly never will. You should thank them for pity killing you.

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Well said Tiger.

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If you have been told you can't play again because you fought back on a roleplaying game, that's a joke and should be looked into. 

Not surprising from a group of individuals that look to systematically kill people that aren't mates with Curtis (or sometimes even are) after they hit a certain age. 

 

I'll say it's very surprising, to be honest.

Given that I'm one of those people and know that I've never said anything even close to that (my whisper, had it ever got through, said pretty much the exact opposite) and am pretty confident that none of those I consider friends would say anything close to that. That's not how any of us operate.

I've no intention of picking through the OP and pointing out inaccuracies or where rumour was a million miles from the truth, but needless to say a major part of the game is knowing which rumours you can trust and knowing which sources are feeding you the truth. You'll always have people telling you that bad bad people are out to get you (I lost count of how many times various people had tried to have those who started this war killed over lies and bullshit) and it's important to be able to make a call on when it's a true threat and when it is lies. Ironically enough, it was nearly always Curtis, the man so often including here painted as the bad guy, who spoke up loudest and defended you against numerous alleged (and untrue) allegations. Funny how things like that work out at times.

Glad to hear you enjoyed the run. Shame the way you decided to end it, from my point of view. If you're happy to die for something you believe in it's always a good way to go, just a shame an awful lot of the stuff you've laid out there is either incorrect or the rumours of shit stirring idiots and far from things worth throwing away a character for.

In spite of the rumours, look forward to seeing what you can go on to achieve in the future and look forward to finally having that debate we've been waiting for ;) 

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I realize how incredibly restraint you are being TsuDhoNimh. I do appreciate that, as this wasn't meant for debate, but clearly I was expecting the pushback. I do want to clarify a few things however, since writing after being awake for 27 hours means things aren't always the clearest.

When I say I was told I won't be able to play the game again, I mean I won't be able to grow. Not that I won't be able to make an account at all and log in or I'll be killed automatically. There's no reason for the admins to get involved or anything for Izzy to do. No one is going to kill me if I sit and do nothing, until I get too old of course, but that's the way the game is played. 

I haven't named the group that I worked with out of some weird sense of loyalty that seems to still be lingering. I can’t get myself to type out their names. But most old school players know exactly who I'm talking about. They build big guns and sit in the shadows. They lived this long because HBR kept every single one of them in his crew early in their run, looking out for them and protecting them. Helping them not be caught. And then, as soon as Deces and NY was killed, they all abandoned HBR and went instead to Las Vegas, where most of them remain. They used HBR and then tossed him aside and left NY to fail. They were not allowed to be anywhere but Las Vegas because of their guns. Or so I was told by one of their highest members; if she lied to me then so be it.

The number of cap killers in Summerlin alone is more than NY as whole would have had anytime soon, even if I hadn’t acted last night. I have seen how they create their purge lists. I have seen the leader of the group I referenced mention bloodlines that he hates, ones that have killed him in the past. I have now had a hand in his death, very purposefully. That won't be forgiven, nor would I ask it to be. Sadly, this is more than a game to some, it's their life. They take it far too seriously and they forget that it's meant for fun. I could give you an example of how it worked; I was asked to hunt down an enemy of this person's using an old email address from a shot report from years ago. I was credited for helping find him so he could be killed. I was thanked and praised. He had done nothing wrong but he was killed. He’s one of your own friends Sat, a man whose new incarnation is even in your profile right now.

Did I do things on this run that I wasn’t proud of? Absolutely. This person can be so convincing when you are on their side. They make it sound like harm would never come to you because they and their whole group have your back. You say Curtis was one that defended me and I’m sure he did to you and to others. But it wasn’t because he liked me or because he had my back. He barely knew me and he didn't make many efforts to try to know me. He did it because of the other person. Hence why it was such a big deal when that person decided to tell the LV leaders that he would no longer vouch for us and we were on our own.   

I’m not one to normally believe rumors Sat. Not unless I see a steady trend or those rumors persist over time. When it became clear that my so called friend didn’t really have the power that he thought he had early on. When he promised that certain people would be killed only to be told no, they wouldn’t, because LV likes them. When I was told I would never be forced to kill someone only to be threatened when I tried to stand up for a friend. When I was lied to, or at least purposefully kept in the dark, about ATS and Reggie’s knowledge of the attack on Lynchy and CH. When I was then told that if ATS and Reggie wanted to kill me because of that attack, which I participated in on behalf of LV, I would have no protection from LV and they would be allowed to do so.  When I was told that I “upset” Curtis because I said that LV had made Mousey kill MikeHunt (which they did btw, just as I was forced to kill Googlez even after being allowed to save him) and I was forced to apologize for something that I thought was utterly ridiculous. I made the comment in a thread where Curtis was explaining that the rest of CH was killed for not killing people that LV wanted dead but I couldn’t name someone that they wanted dead who was actually killed?!

The funny thing is, I honestly feel that they played the game excellently. They took anyone who could work against them, made other people kill them and then took them into Las Vegas and let them play without incog and told them we made the decisions to kill them all on our own. People can bitch and moan and complain all they want but Curtis, Grin and Fitz are smart players and they have won this game fair and square. Well….except two are now dead, but they made it to the top. How no one pro’d a GFC after another GFC fell and others were dying is beyond me. Big fuck up on the part of his people tbh. But that’s for another discussion.

Just because I got tired of their actions, because I decided to make a stand, does not mean I want to sit here and trash anyone. That’s not what I meant to do. This is a mafia game and they have cut down anyone that could do them harm to secure their place at the top. That takes a certain amount of skill and patience to do. I won’t trash what they’ve done because I was a part of that. I learned a lot from them about how to play this game and how to get to the top. They are good players, not matter what anyone says. That doesn't mean you have to like them or respect them. They play the game to win, not to make friends. 

And to be very clear: Curtis is not and has never been the one to tell me I will be bloodlined and won’t be allowed to rise again any time soon. That credits goes to the group that I turned against. Curtis is too smart to say that outloud and honestly I'm sure he could care less about me. I haven't even spoken to the man in nearly a week, since I woke up to the message of him telling me who in my district needed to die that day. 

Things aren’t always black and white folks. Curtis takes the brunt of the shit for whatever reason, and I’ve given him plenty myself, but my actions and now my death were 100% because of the people behind the scenes that are running the show with him. Had their leader stayed loyal and kept his promises, yesterday would never have happened.

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Since Tsu has brought much of this into contention and I'm new here and haven't seen/heard enough to make a judgment on it, I'm not going to touch the specific accusations that Tiger-Lady is making here.

I will, however, point out that the behavior she's describing is incredibly common when any "setup" or "regime" wields the power and influence to do so. As someone who has both been targeted by them and participated in similar takedowns, I can definitely guarantee you that purges, purge-cities, and nepotism can run rampant. I don't mean to call anyone out, but multiple hegemonic regimes in the last few years have done this and it's well-documented.

That being said, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. The game is far too small for players to ignore the cities around them, and is not large enough for purging to not be the most conducive strategy for long-term success. They can either adopt a transparent "I won't let you be a threat to me" or a deceitful "I will let you build and grow and kill you when I think you're a threat to me". After all, this is the Mafia. Not exactly known for its transparency.

It sounds barbaric, but those at the top have two options: let your potential killers grow up below you or let your potential killers grow up in another city. The purges will happen because they can happen. If we don't like this behavior, we either need a code change or a culture change. And I don't foresee either happening in the near future that could eliminate stuff like this.

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"I have seen the leader of the group I referenced mention bloodlines that he hates, ones that have killed him in the past."

Countless times the quest is revenge. To set a goal to kill a bloodline who killed their bloodline (who died as well)tells me something is wrong.     The wheels on the bus go round and round. Fuck all else who are not in the loop. 

 

"I was asked to hunt down an enemy of this person's using an old email address from a shot report from years ago."

You got me thinking about this here, and all I am going to say is I can top that and what comes to mind is not pretty. Sad.

 

 

 

 

 

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I'm not going to get into all of the things you've said which I think are untrue, but since you've listed my cofeeshop name multiple times in this, I will respond to the main ones.

By you own admission you made a promise to someone outside of your family and seem to think that justifies your actions. It doesn't. You were a leader, a Godfather even, and anyone in that position has an overriding duty to their family. The result of your actions is that your entire family and district is largely in the ground. To me, that isn't good leadership, that is OOC bullshit causing the needless deaths of a lot of people.

The whole "we went out with a bang" or "went down shooting" mentality is totally selfish.

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This Forum Is For Non RP Talk About The Game (AKA OOC)

 

TheThrownMonopoly, I am pleased your name is my honor. It's a fucking monopoly with a small group and a bunch of pawns set up to be nothing but fish bait. Go fuck yourself.

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I believe he meant OOC as in the reason they died was for OOC reasoning, but I'd not pay much attention, it's just the last death rattle of the largest propaganda machine on their roster. Even his spinning of the truth couldn't keep him alive forever.

In a couple of weeks when Vegas had cleaned up Detroit, Philadelphia, Daniella and Mouseycop, he would have been one of the first people out there making sure everyone knew that it was their own faults they had died and there's nothing to see here, just the mafia at work.

Being beat to the punch sucks.

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Previous response got cut off half way through.

I'm not going to get into all of the things you've said which I think are untrue, but since you've listed my cofeeshop name multiple times in this, I will respond to the main ones.

By you own admission you made a promise to someone outside of your family and seem to think that justifies your actions. It doesn't. You were a leader, a Godfather even, and anyone in that position has an overriding duty to their family. The result of your actions is that your entire family and district is largely in the ground. To me, that isn't good leadership, that is OOC bullshit causing the needless deaths of a lot of people.

The whole "we went out with a bang" or "went down shooting" mentality is totally selfish and people deserve better than that from their leaders. If that's your thing, don't take on the responsibility of leading all those people, go rogue. I hate seeing it and hoped you and those who accompanied you in this suicidal assault had more respect from their members than that. Evidently not.

You stated previously that I knew no boundaries and cited the example of my shooting an LV Boss after she mugged me as explanation of that. To correct you, I didn't shoot her because she mugged me, I shot her because she was either unwilling or incapable of seeing why this was a stupid thing to do and didn't apologise for doing so during any of the three opportunities I gave her to do so after the incident. I subsequently let members of the same family continue living despite them threatening me and promising her revenge. These are hardly the actions of someone out of control as you imply.

You try to dismiss Disorder backing you because he didn't know you personally as if that devalues it; it should actually be praised all the more because it goes against the stupid shit you and others have said about him. You know who wanted Argyle to get to Godfather the most out of any of us? Disorder. You know who wanted you and mouseycop to be allowed to become bosses and Godfathers when others wanted you dead? Disorder. Now you can claim that is all because of the man behind the curtain, but anyone who knows Disorder can tell you sure as shit that he's a) his own man and b) a genuinely trusting guy who gives people the benefit of the doubt. You should consider that before you toss out shit about him because believe me you'll notice in a heartbeat the day he becomes as cynical as some of the others around here.

My whisper was "an eye for an eye" and the shot, on a Godfather from another city entirely, was an hour or so before the attack on LV. So please don't pretend this was a stand up to tyranny for the greater good etc. etc., because it wasn't. It was selfish tit for tat for OOC reasons that grew with the act.

Jeb, Lucius gave DT autonomy and was the primary advocate for their continued survival. Lucius moved to CH rather than claiming an LV district to try and assist mouseycop from being targeted as a result of her hard work because she took on a lot of grief and abuse that was just a matter of perception. Lucius told Daniella she had earned the right to be where she was and he believed she had. He had no intention of killing any of those people and had limited interaction with Argyle, for whom Disorder was happy to vouch, hence his continued progression through this life up until yesterday. Obviously we'll never know now, but there you go.

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Your belief may very well be correct. Fuck it I will say you are correct.  Bottom line:  OOC did come into play with the itty biddie titty committee. That will never cease. However, If they had any brains and respect for this game, they would feel less of a need to do this wheels on the bus go round and round theme. I agree being beat to the punch does suck.

 

Something got to give. And I am not going to recite what needs to give again because it went in one ear and out the other. The itty biddie titty committee is fixated on their pleasure and fuck all else.

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Weird, someone who was in Chicago defending a person in Las Vegas.

Sounds a lot like OOC bullshit.

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This Forum Is For Non RP Talk About The Game (AKA OOC)
Replying to: Sorry not Sorry
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