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| The Art of the Whisper | Started by: PrinceofCheese on Dec 25, '07 21:15 |
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A fine piece of mature cheddar enters the courtyard once more All, I feel that the days of creative deaths are slowly passing but in an attempt to relive the good times I would like you all to listen and take notes basically the whole way through the following speech concerning those final words we all utter as you finish off your many victims. Let's look at the more basic whispers to start. "Pwned bitch" That's always fun. You have to remember that killing someone is the greatest revenge that you can get in this world, so a whisper is your way of signing it and letting the victim know full well who got them. The classic "pwned bitch" is so popular because it's truth. They have been pwned, and they are a bitch. Does exactly what it would have said on its tin were it sold in such a container. "Wait a minute... Wait just a God damned minute. Aren't you dead? Haha, yeah you are. Laterz." Now this is a more taunting version of the first whisper. There is completely no comeback to it, unless their friends or family take it upon themselves to exact revenge on your skinny ass. Which, lets face it, happens often in this lovely world of ours. "Steven says hi." Now this is known as an 'incriminating whisper'. Regardless of whether or not you know this Steven character he is implicated in the murder. Steven will most likely be inundated with questions about whether or not they ordered this persons death or actually did the killing. It is important to note at this point that should the real culprit of this cold blooded attack be found then it is likely that revenge will be taken. Expect a "pwned bitch" shortly. And by Steven I do mean Evsie and by Evsie I probably mean you. So you've got the hang of that have you? Nice work. Let's move on to the intermediary whispers. "How about you keep your comments to yourself next time eh?" This whisper is usually handed out to people who have been either cocky or insulting in a public area within the 5 cities, occasionally the result of a bad tempered argument. This generally speaking is the end of the argument and should be treated as a victory for the killer. Bravo to you. You've done well. "And that's the end of that." Despite the fact that this one may seem definitive it does tend to leave a lot unanswered questions. Mainly because it never is the end of that as the deceased will tend to bear a son resulting in a "pwned bitch", "steven says hi" or one of the other sinister incarnations from above. Onto advanced. From this point in it's hardcore only so avert your eyes if you haven't been practising with the above to this point.... Alright onto the bad ass whispers- 'IA' This is one which really insults the veteran mafioso. You might ask why but the point is that you only use it when your victim is clearly extremely energetic, loving his criminal life, has many ambitions, girlfriends/boyfriends (np Dan) and absolutely sees the future laid out before them. A preferable moment for this one is just as they have been given auth and have spent hours setting up their headquarters and gaining their first couple of precious followers. Again, it doesn't tend to breed love in the criminal community but it is a clear victory for the obnoxious killer. Use it as the ultimate taunt to the first time auth. Heart breaking stuff, well done, well done. Moving into the final stretch but don't stop now, the finest is yet to come- 'Will you marry me Josephine" The key to this one is total irrelevance. The victim has no idea why you have left this message, it has no application to them whatsoever and in general their brain explodes at the thought of this being adequate reasoning for their death. The ultimate in disdain, this one says "Your death is not even important enough for me to talk about anything applicable, you are insignificant to me and I have taken something important from you for nothing but whimsical amusement". So yes, quite an effective spite, in your gace you might even say, in your gace indeed. Penultimate and really quite ultimate in its application is- "Haha the joek is on you, snatch a purse to be resurrected" Only tends to work on n00bs but some very silly boys have been know to go through the process of death recognition as a result of this one: 1. OMG OMG OMG I'm dead AAAAA 2. OMG I'm not it's a funny joke hahaha what a crazy joke, I think I'll play that on my friend John. Phew I'm so happy I'm alive, such a relief, my life is once again complete. 3. **Attempts to snatch a purse (difficult when you are dead)** 4. **Nothing happens** 5. Hahahahha it's ok the joke continues. Ah it's like being mafia punk'd. 6. **Tries to rob a 7/11** 7. **Nothing happens** 8. Tears flow profusely from ghost eyes as the punchline finally hits. Last but dare I say, least is the classic, all time great - "Requested" Historically used when a Mafioso makes a request of a friend to kill his bloodline so that his son might start afresh. The intelligent killer uses it to protect himself and to say 'I have just fucked your eyeball out' to this victim. Those who might catch a glimpse of the killing will be 'Ah np np he asked for it, no need to worry' whilst the victim sits thinking 'I never wanted to die, who would do this to me and who just who would then lie, am I being tricked, what is happening AAAAAAAAAAA' I think that shall suffice for now, learn well my friends for my expectations are high. That's all, POC. |
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Steven doesn't say "Hi" anymore, he's an antisocial old fart...and an accountant to boot. Bravo though, Abso-bloody-exactly right that stuff. |
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| Reply by: Octavius at Dec 25, '07 21:23 | |
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Personally I've always been partial to the "carrying on a conversation" whispers, where you've been chatting with this fellow, and then send your last reply directly to the grave with them. Best used when talking to someone completely ignorant. |
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| Reply by: Zig-Zag at Dec 25, '07 22:07 | |
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I must say listening to you has brought joy to my heart, I hope more mafioso's will pay attention to your fine teaching, there is nothing worse in this world than a mute killer... Personally my family line has always found every kill as a new experience and treated each as such, each death would carry with it original words for that particular person... The Whisper.... a great tool for the experienced killers out there!! Kudos to you for a great subject! |
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| Reply by: Kobayashi at Dec 25, '07 22:21 | |
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Ah, the whisper. One of the truly underappreciated points of this life. Every great killer has his whisper, and it is what separates the artists from the pretenders. Everyone in my family who has killed has developed their own signature whisper. For obvious reasons, I won't go into specifics. But everyone has had his own, and I am no different. Or I will be no different. Can't say in public. Personal friends get more personal whispers, always. If it is someone you care for, but has run into a spot of trouble and wants his friend to take him out, you obviously leave a more personal note. Otherwise, we have always gone with amusing/wise quotes, memorable song lyrics, or something of the like. |
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| Reply by: SotallyTober at Dec 26, '07 00:19 | |
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| $25,000 for the first person who uses one of those on PrinceOfCheese. | |
| Reply by: a1capon3 at Dec 26, '07 05:52 | |
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| Personally, the "ultimate brain exploder" one I like to use is Whisper? Ha, you're not worth the effort, gives major satisfaction to the killer, and the victims implodes - again - after death at the insult. | |
| Reply by: ElainaDeLuca at Dec 26, '07 14:32 | |
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A false accusation is the best way to get the old double whammy. Something like "This is for killing xxx". Of course, you know your victim didn't kill xxx, because you did it. Never let the truth get in the way of a good whisper. It has the extra benefit of making your victim too busy vindicating himself from the accusation to actually find out who killed him. |
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| Reply by: KevinTheCat at Dec 26, '07 20:50 | |
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I've always been a fan of using someone elses IRC alias in the old whispers. "Take that Camazotz." "Well well foxboy, thought you could hide behind this incog eh gregz0r?" Something to this affect. Of course you know full well it isn't Camazotz and then they are all "OMG OMG OMG I WAS KILLED BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT I WAS THAT GAY". It hurts more when they are under the assumption you've dismantled all their hard work mistakenly. The fact that you haven't is best kept quiet for maximum satisfaction. |
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| Reply by: a1capon3 at Dec 26, '07 20:59 | |
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My family haven't killed anyone in months damnit! Hell, none of them have done enough petties to get a gun, let alone come close to using it. Git. I was told a story of a great hitter who called himself HOG. At the time of this tale he had "his" whisper, which he used on every one of his victims. It is rumoured someone bearing a striking resemblance to my great*569 grandfather got hold of this whisper and used it on all of his kills too... thus boosting the fearsome reputation of the great HOG, while safely avoiding any punishments for naughty kills himself. (I should point out this was before we got to know each other) Conversations like this would regularly take place in the coffee shops (apologies for ooc here). CL: "Did you kill xxxxx" DudeThatLookedLikeGrandpa: "no" CL: "They have a WS" DudeThatLookedLikeGrandpa: "It's a fake, I didn't do it" CL: "They'll take a screenshot" DudeThatLookedLikeGrandpa: "They'll fake a screenshot! I got the last IA, or I'd shoot to prove it wasn't me." CL: "I think you're lying" DudeThatLookedLikeGrandpa: "What was the whisper" CL: "blah blah blah" DudeThatLookedLikeGrandpa: "isn't that HOGs whisper?" CL: "oh yeah, sorry, probably him, that random wacking rapscallion (or words to that effect)" DudeThatLookedLikeGrandpa: "np man, glad I could help" The moral of this story is simply this: Personalised whispers are silly. Anything that gets another person you hate killed for your work is impressive. oh, and finally, 1337 song lyrics are just silly. DO YOU HEAR ME TIGGY? SILLY! ahem. |
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| Reply by: PossiblyNotEvsie at Dec 28, '07 05:51 | |
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| ha ive used a few of those | |
| Reply by: OB-Original_Bender at Dec 29, '07 20:33 | |
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