ok i wrote a screenplay. here is some of it, im not done yet. i hope you guys like it!!!!!

The Chronicles of a Redneck Hitman

 A Short Screenplay

By

Samuel T. Pynes

4 People-

1 Goal-

VENGEANCE

THE HITMAN

1. INT. ABANDONED WAREHOUSE- NIGHT

A man (THE BROTHER) is chained up to a chair with handcuffs attached to his ankles and wrists to the legs of the chair. His ankles and wrists are rubbed raw. The Brother is naked besides a pair of bloodied jeans. He has cuts, gashes, and burns across his body. He is covered in blood like the floor beneath him. He is in a rundown warehouse somewhere in Alabama. There is shipping containers and old machinery all over the place. The Brother is murmuring nonsense to himself. The Brother hears somebody coming from the stairs to the bosses' office. A man (THE BOSS) comes toward The Brother. The Boss is wearing a clean white suit with mirrored aviator sunglasses. He is clean cut with short blond hair. He is carry a blowtorch and priers. He puts them on a poker table near The Brother with several tools on it. The Boss takes off his jacket and sets it on a chair.

The Boss

So......How's my little buddy doing?

The Brother

Fuck You.

The Boss

That’s not how you treat an friend is it?

The Brother spits in The Boss's face. The Boss is slow to react. He whips the spit from his face while showing no emotion. They stare at each other for several seconds.

The Boss

You know how I like to kill rats don't you?

The Brother

Fuck you. He's my brother. I'm loyal to blood before-

The Brother groans from pain. The Boss laughs and smirks.

The Boss

I like to have some fun with them and when I'm done I just end they're pitiful life’s. My favorite weapon is an knife. It can be an elegant weapon, but yet it is so simple. Not really brutish like a shotgun or a bat.

The Boss pulls out a beautiful stiletto knife with an ivory handle.

The Boss

So what is your answer? Remain loyal to that fuckin' piece of shit brother of yours or I'll be most generous and allow you a second chance.

The Brother struggles to get free but fails

The Boss

Enough said.

Then in anger, The Boss lashes out at The Brother with the knife across the chest. The Brother screams in pain. The attack continues for several seconds. The Boss stops. His breathing is heavy. The Brother is nearly passed out from the continuing pain.

The Boss

You fuckin' motherfucker. How dare you-

The Boss notices The Brother is nearly out. The Boss smiles. He then bitch slaps The Brother, he awakens.

The Boss

How dare you betray me? I loved you like a brother, but now you are a roach. A petty little fuckin' roach that I will crush between my toes. And now my friend, you will burn like a roach.

The Boss says this calmly like he has done this before. The Boss goes to the poker table and takes a can of gasoline from below it. The Boss walks slowly towards The Brother. The Brother panics.

The Brother

No! No! No! No! No!

The Boss calmly and slowly pours gasoline on The Brother. The Brother starts screaming.

The Brother

Stop please stop.

The Boss

And what are the words I want to hear?

The Brother

I'll join. I'll join.

The Boss

Yeah, I'm listening.

The Boss stops pouring the gasoline. The Brother laughs.

 The Brother

Yeah, I'll join you in hell you fuckin' son of a-

The Boss losses his cool composure once again.

The Boss

Shut the fuck up you cock sucking piece of shit.

The Boss pulls out a 9mm and shoots The Brother in the base of the skull. The Brother is dead. The Boss brushes himself off. He finishes pouring the gasoline. He puts back on his jacket. The Boss pulls out a fancy silver lighter from his jacket pocket and ignites the lighter. The Boss smiles. The Boss then drops the lighter and walks through the warehouse door with The Brother burning in the background.

EXT. WAREHOUSE- NIGHT

The Boss gets into a white chromed out 57' Chevy Bel Air convertible parked in the dirt driveway of the warehouse. He starts the car and "Won't Get Fooled Again" by The Who is playing on the radio. He starts driving down the road.

SCREEN SLOWLY FADES BLACK

START CREDITS

Earlier That Day

2. INT. DINER- MORNING

It is about nine-ish in the morning. People are eating steak and eggs and biscuits and gravy. THE BROTHER and THE HITMAN are sitting in a booth. The Brother is in a Lynyrd Skynyrd tee shirt with jeans and The Hitman is in a black wife- beater, faded jeans, and boots. They both are drinking coffee.

The Brother

Yeah, this guy needs to be fuckin takin' care of. It'll pay well and-

The Hitman

The risk isn't worth the pay; I've already told you damn it. I got a family now.

 The Brother

He'll pay well. 100 grand. It'll get you out of that shitty as fuck trailer. Think about your family.

The Hitman

I'm fuckin' am. My son, your nephew, was just born. He needs a father.

The Brother

He'll pay 25 grand up front and the rest when the hit is done. Come on. One last job. I know you lost a lot when the economy went down the shitter. This could get you back on your feet.

The Hitman

I know you care, but the answer is no. I've told you I can't do it. There would be too much at risk.

The Brother

He'll be pretty pissed I'll tell you that right now.

The Hitman

Fuckem’. He don't have anything to live for does he?

The Brother

I guess your right bout that. But I'll tell you what, watch out for him.

The Hitman

Don't worry. If tries anything, Mr. 9mm will be waitin’.

The Brother

You just don't get it. Its fuckin' 100 grand were talking about here. Shit man, were not expecting you to become a button man again or anything. But god- damn it. He's gonna be fuckin' pissed that’s for sure. Fuckin' be ready when the shit hits the fan.

The Brother gets up and leaves angrily while The Hitman just sits there with a thousand yard stare.

SCREEN FADES BLACK

3. INT. WAREHOUSE- OFFICE- LATE AFTERNOON

The Boss is sitting in a cozy office chair at a large wooden desk. The Brother is sitting across from The Boss. There are three other men (PUNK 1, PUNK 2, and PUNK 3) standing by the door. The office is dark due to the blinds pulled down (Kinda similar to when Anakin meets Yoda in Revenge of the Sith.)The Boss is pissed. The Boss is pulling them both a drink.

The Boss

What the fuck do you mean he said no?

The Brother

He said no, as simple as that.

The Boss

Why?

The Brother

His son was just born.

The Boss

Great, more inbreeds.

The Brother

What you just say?

The Boss

Are you fuckin’ deaf? I said “Great, more inbreeds”. I can’t believe you still think that he is your brother.

The Brother

You need to watch your fuckin’ mouth.

The Boss

Oh, boo hue. He is your father’s bastard son. I myself wouldn’t call that family.

The Brother

I don’t really give a fuck what you call it. He is my brother. Why the hell you talkin’ shit anyways? You don’t know your father or mother anyways-

The Boss

Ok, ok. We’ll have this talk some other time. Now what was the reason your “brother” wouldn’t do the job?

The Brother

His son was just born.

The Boss

Ok right. Do I look like I give a fuck about his son? When I have a job for somebody I expect them to carry it out to the fullest ability. And if they don't you know what happens don't you?

The Brother

Yeah but-

The Boss

Am I going' to have a fuckin' problem with you bout this?

The Brother

No sir.

The Boss

Ok then. I got a certain job for you. It’ll have you go to Jacksonville, but the job isn’t that hard. Just need you to give some pretty pure heroin from Germany or some shit to some guys. They’re paying top dollar for this shit. I got it from one of my associates in L.A. Lance is his name. You know him by chance?

The Brother

No, I don’t think so. I might have meet him before but I don’t know. So who’s the people I need to get it to?

The Boss

Some niggers.

The Brother

I thought you don’t like em’?

The Boss laughs and then pours another drink.

The Boss

Hey, if they’re supplying the money, I’m supplying the goods. I don’t really give a fuck what they look like if they got the money.

The Brother

I got to take a leak. I’ll be back in a minute.

The Brother leaves the office. The Boss keeps an eye on The Brother. The Boss turns his attention to the three punks.

The Boss

Now, I got a job for you three. This man refused to do a little something for me and we need to make an example of him. I need you three to go to where he leaves and I want him and his family dead. You will get paid 100 grand spilt three ways. You got me?

Punk Two

I think I got a little problem with this.

The Boss

What is it?

Punk Two

Well, the guy has a wife and a baby boy and-

The Boss pulls out a 9mm and shots Punk Two dead.

The Boss

Anybody else have a problem?

Punk One

Why the fuck you just shoot Marvin? God Damn man.

The Boss

Am I gonna have a problem with you now? You want your fuckin’ brains blown across my office?

Punk One

No, but did you really have to shoot him? Did you?

The Boss

Shut the fuck up.

Punk One

Ok.

The Boss

Ok. Now you'll be getting 50 grand a piece. Now lets get to work.

SCREEN FADES BLACK

4. INT. TRUCK (MOVING)- NIGHT

The Hitman is driving down the street. The street is empty. The Hitman is driving down a country road to his trailer. His cell phone rings. Its The Brother.

The Hitman

Yeah-

The Brother (OS)

Its me, some serious shits goin' down.

The Hitman

What the fuck you mean?

The Brother (OS)

He ordered an hit on you and your family.

The Hitman

What?

The Brother (OS)

He ordered an fuckin' hit on you and your family. Are you deaf or somethin'? The hit is gonna go down tonight. Be ready. The shit hit the fan.

The Hitman

Shit! Ok, I'm just a mile away from the trailer.

The Brother (OS)

I hear someone coming.

The Hitman hears a man (The Boss) yelling and beating on a door on the phone.

The Brother (OS)

Oh shit. They caught me man. I'm at the warehouse. Call the cops or come or something, but get to your family. Go now!

The Boss knocks down the door, and a fight ensues. The line goes dead.

The Hitman

Shit, fuck, fuckin' shit fuck motherfucker! God damn it! That’s son of a bitch gonna die!

The Hitman pulls into his driveway. There is an unrecognizable car in the way. The Hitman pulls out a .44 magnum. There is a woman and a child screaming in the trailer. The Hitman gets out of the truck.

Punk Three (OS)

Shut the bitch up man.

Punk One (OS)

Ok, just wait a sec.

The Wife (OS)

(Screaming)

There is two gunshots. The two Punks walk out the trailer. The Punks notice The Hitman and start shooting. The Hitman gets into the truck, ducks and starts it, and drives off shooting at the Punks. The Punks shoot back and get into the car and chase after The Hitman. The Hitman calls 911.

911 Lady (OS)

911. What is your emergency?

The Hitman

These guys just shot my wife and son.

911 Lady (OS)

Are they still alive?

The Hitman

How the fuck should I know? I was outside. I heard two gunshots inside. Get your dumb-asses over there now!

911 Lady (OS)

What is your address?

The Hitman

1408 Spring lake Lane.

911 Lady (OS)

Police and an ambulance will arrive shortly.

The Hitman hangs up the phone. The Hitman turns on the highway. The Thugs are still shooting. The two speed past a cop car. Cop calls in back-up. The cop pursues. Soon the Thugs end up losing control and flipping in a ditch. The Hitman continues driving with the cops behind.

5. INT. WAREHOUSE- NIGHT

The Hitman reaches the warehouse. He runs out of the truck and goes inside.

The Hitman see’s his brothers’ burnt corpse.

The Hitman

Ah fuck, ah fuck.

The Hitman drops to his knees. He takes out his gun. The cops enter with their guns raised. They see the burnt corpse. The Hitman puts the gun to his head.

Cop One

Aw shit.

Fat Cop

Drop the gun buddy.

The Hitman doesn’t respond.

Fat Cop

Hey, Buddy. Drop the gun. We don’t want to see no harm to you or anybody else k’? So just drop the gun.

The Hitman drops the gun.

Fat Cop

Now, slide the gun to us.

The Hitman does.

Fat Cop

Now we need to put these handcuffs on you ok?

The Hitman

K’

The Fat Cop walks to The Hitman. The Hitman grabs the Fat Cop, takes his gun, puts it the Fat Cops head before the other cops can react.

The Hitman

None of you motherfuckers move or Mr. Piggly Wiggly will get his fatass head blown off! Got me?

Cop One

You don’t want to be doing this man.

The Hitman

Shut the fuck up! Now drop your guns!

The cops keep their guns up.

The Hitman

Mr. Wiggly, tell these men to drop their guns or I’ll blow your head off. And that will break my fuckin’ heart.

Mr. Wiggly

Drop your guns.

The cops lay their guns on the floor.

The Hitman

Now, kick the guns over here. And also you’re radios.

The cops kick them to The Hitman.

The Hitman

Ok, good. Now I will walk out of this place and you guys will not do anything bout it. Got me?

The cops shake their heads yes.

The Hitman

Now, go inside that shipping container. All of you.

The Hitman points to a shipping container in a corner.

The Hitman

Now!

The cops rush inside.

The Hitman

Mr. Wiggly, you’ve been a real sport today so-

The Hitman turns Mr. Wiggly around and punches him in the face. Mr. Wiggly goes to the ground. Mr. Wiggly cries.

Mr. Wiggly

Shit! I think he broke my nose!

The cops pull him inside the shipping container.

The Hitman

Bye bye Piggly Wiggly.

The Hitman locks the shipping container. The Hitman picks up his .44 and walks out the warehouse.

EXT. WAREHOUSE- NIGHT

The Hitman walks to his truck, gets in, and drives off.

SCREEN SLOWLY FADES BLACK

THE FAT COP

6. INT. WAREHOUSE-NIGHT

M.O.S. A man (THE HITMAN) has a gun to the head of The Fat Cop. The Hitman is yelling. Cops have their guns pointed at The Hitman. The Hitman is screaming. The Hitman shots The Fat Cop in the head. The cops release a barrage of bullets at The Hitman. Both The Fat Cop and The Hitman are shot out of screen.

7. INT. MASTER BEDROOM- NIGHT

The Fat Cop awakes from the dream. He looks at his alarm clock. It reads 02:40 AM. He gets up and walks to the master bedroom. After about ten seconds you hear a flush and The Fat Cop comes out. He walks out the bedroom.

8. INT. KITCHEN- NIGHT

The Fat Cop walks to the kitchen. He opens the fridge. He stares for several seconds. He takes out a beer and a container of Chinese food.

INT. LIVING ROOM- NIGHT

The Fat Cop walks into the living room. He turns on the TV and lays down on the couch. He opens the can of beer and takes a long gulp. He flips through the channels. He stops flipping through. He found the movie “Death Wish”. He notices how the main character kills criminals outside the law. The Fat Cop gets up and walks back up to the master bedroom.

9. INT. MASTER BEDROOM- NIGHT

The Fat Cop turns on the lights. Nobody else is in the room. He walks to the corner of the room where a gun locker is. He opens the lock and pulls out a .357 magnum. He holds it in his hands. He checks if the gun is loaded. It isn’t. He looks down the barrel. Its dirty. He takes out a cleaning kit and starts cleaning it.

SCREEN FADES BLACK.

10. INT. MASTER BEDROOM- MORNING

The Fat Cop walks up on the floor. Its about 8 AM. A cleaned .357 magnum lay to his right. He gets up and walks out.

11. INT. LIVING ROOM- MORNING

The Fat Cop walks to the living room. He sits down on the couch and picks up the phone and dials a number.

Fat Cop

Hey Dave? Its me. I got something we need to do.

12. INT. CAR (MOVING)- MORNING

Two men are in a car. The Fat Cop is in the drivers seat. Another man (DAVE) is in the passenger seat. Dave is an another fat guy. They are driving down a busy street. The Fat Cop seems embarrassed.

Dave

You want to do what?

The Fat Cop

I want to… be an… vigilante.

Dave

What the fuck are you talking about? A couple of months ago you were a cop. A fuckin’ cop. You could waste all the pricks you want. All you need to do is plant a gun and crack on some fuck and say in the police report, “This guy pulled a gun” and all that shit. And now you want to go shot some drug dealers and pimps?

The Fat Cop

Well-

Dave

Is this because of that guy that almost blow your fucking head off?

The Fat Cop nodes yes.

Dave

I can’t believe you. An motherfucking hick decides to go ape-shit and takes you hostage for like 2 minutes and you want to go ‘Death Wish’ and hunt the fuck down? I’m guessing you want to get the guy back right? Am I right?

The Fat Cop has a look on his face that kind of says that he was watching Death Wish the night before.

Dave

Oh my fucking God. You were watching Death Wish last night weren’t you!?

The Fat Cop

Yes-

Dave

Ha I knew it! I was watching it too. But God damn…

An awkward silence.

Dave

Why the hell do you want to do this? You know the consequences right?

The Fat Cop

Yes and-

Dave

Hey, I know you went through a lot since you were let go and the divorce but it doesn’t justify you going out and shooting pimps does it?

The Fat Cop

No-

Dave

Ok then-

The Fat Cop

The cops aren’t doing a damn thing about any of this! This is our chance to rid the streets of evil! The people will thank us. I’m sure they will. And I’ll be able to get that mofo back.

Dave

So… you just want to do this for revenge right?

The Fat Cop

No. Well kinda. Only if I can somehow come across him that’s all. That’s all. You could help me and-

Dave

Whoa, wait a sec. So, let me get this straight. First, you watched Death Wish. Second, now you want to be a vigilante. And third, you want me to join you to kill pimps, drug dealers, and the like right?

The Fat Cop nodes his head yes.

The Fat Cop

Yeah I do.

Dave

You’re fucking insane.

The Fat Cop

No. I’m perfectly sane. I will be your Batman and you could be my Robin. What do you say? You wanna join the team?

Dave

God Damn. Ok ok. But I’m just gonna make sure mine and your ass don’t get in trouble ok? I ain’t gonna be the one cappin’ hookers and burying their skanky asses k’?

The Fat Cop

You got a deal my friend. You got a deal.

To Be Continued

I really enjoyed this story
I really enjoyed this story

although it was a bit long it was quite entertaining
although it was a bit long it was quite entertaining

I'm looking forward to part 2

thanks. i just wrote it when i was bored. its about 23 pages long  so far but a normal screenplay in about 90 pages so i got a ways to go!!!

Sneakyrat was listening to Pynzee's story... his faithful sponsor had plans. He wanted to write story's. Interesting futuristic story that was. He wonders what kind of weapons futur mobsters will be using and what kind of cars they will drive in 20, 30 years from now. Pynzee does has skills he must admit.

"Great story there my good friend1"

Sneakyrat pats Pynzee on the back!

This is good stuff. I hope you'll keep this story going

After witnessing a strange hitman walking down the street, Conway thought for a moment before deciding it wasn't any of his business to meddle with the other's affairs. He did wish him good luck before running off to a local corner, however.

(OOC: Nice writing. From what I saw the structure was a little strange to the eyes, but other than that I think you're doing pretty well for yourself)