The Sunshine Crime Syndicate

HQ Status: Currently Recruiting

Message me or one my my hands about joining us!

The blood of New York runs through these Las Vegas veins..

Forever grateful to New York..

<IzzyCreamcheese> Success! handlebarz was set free.

I died and came back like fuckin' Jesus..

❤ A Story About Love ❤

[13:44] handlebarz:twas afk

[13:49] Reason:twas a night like this

[13:49] handlebarz:on a warm summer's eve

[13:50] Reason:I was in a pool

[13:52] handlebarz:that's when the old hairy man who looked at me through his window all day finally came to speak to me

[13:53] Reason:And what he said shocked me so much:

[13:53] handlebarz:"come here piggy piggy...here piggy piggy."

[13:54] Reason:As soon as he said that, I knew that I shouldn't have lubricated myself with bacon grease.

[13:55] handlebarz:"sure, it makes for a great tan...but at what cost?" i asked myself...that's when he

[13:57] Reason:smiled at me and took out some sunscreen lotion and looked at me in a very sensual way.

[13:59] handlebarz:he stretched his banana hammock bikini away from his body and just started pouring the sunscreen into his package

[14:01] Reason:Then, I said, "Wait! That's not how you do it, let me show you how."

[14:02] handlebarz:i exited the pool seductively and reached into his banana hammock and pulled out a glob of sunscreen

[14:02] Reason:I assumed it was sunscreen because it was white, but I was doubting this because of the way he shuddered.

[14:03] handlebarz:and thats how i fell in love