TheMeTooMovement steps out from the alleyway donning a pin-stripe suit and holding a Tommy Gun style machine gun. He lights a cigarette with a book of matches retrieved from his fedora hat

As many of you know, the son of an infamous Commissar from generations past, CommissarKuku, has joined our underworld community after his father's exile.  The point of this memorandum is not to delve into the details behind his father's banishment, but to raise some awareness as to his current situation.  Upon Commissar senior's incarceration, the federal government seized all his assets.  This forfeiture has left him in a precarious position he is unaccustomed to, practically destitute, as is evident by his listed writing contest prize amount, which pales in comparison to that of his predecessor's.

What I am asking from the community is to dig deep into your own pockets and contribute what you can (after taking care of your own family's responsibilities of course).  And here's the kicker... as an added incentive, any contributor will receive 10% or their donation cashback.  Yes, you heard me correctly.  That's 10% of whatever you choose to donate.  For instance, if you donate $1,000,000, you will receive $100,000 back.  Not many fundraisers out there offering that kind of incentive I can assure you heh.

TheMeTooMovement flicks his cigarette onto the sidewalk

Monies can be sent directly to me.  Please include "CommissarKuku MobFundMe" in your banking memo.  Your 10% cashback is guaranteed in a timely manner.  Please consider giving.  For those on the fence, I ask that you put yourself in CommissaKuku's position, having just come to these shores without any inheritance to speak of.  Not a pleasant thought.  Thank you all for your time.

TheMeTooMovement pulls his lucky coin from his pocket and flips it in the air, disappearing back into the alley

Oh by the way, 100% of all proceeds will go directly to the Commissar.  I will be happy to field any additional questions should anybody have any.  Thank you all once again.

The spirit of this drive is not to "return favors" or for me to track whose kin owes the Commissar's late father.  I'm simply looking for people to be charitable and am adding an incentive to encourage that spirit.  There is nothing sinister at play here.  I am not profiting from this and as stated previously all proceeds will go to CommissarKuku.  Thanks in advance.

TheMeTooMovement tips his fedora hat to Chalk and nods respectfully

My comment wasn’t to you personally, MeToo, it was at the insane idea that the people who should be asked to give money for this, even though nobody should be personally asked to help with this contest, should specifically be those who were given bullshit money in a previous time.

i would suggest however, to further legitimise this, that anyone who would like to help, could give you a tip for your speech, and then the total amount of tips can be given to the prize fund. Just an idea.

Chalk - I think that the generous soul who created this fundraiser isn't suggesting that the money goes to the writing contest.  As ever, that's coming out of my pocket.

I think that the fundraiser is in recognition of the fact that City Hall seized all of my father's considerable assets, thus leaving me to enter this world with no funds of my own.  My father was the richest, and at the time, most powerful mobster in this society.  I am neither of these things.  

My father had lots of enemies, but some friends, and it seems they had children who were loyal.  I am grateful for this.

As for tipping - Chalk, you need to pay closer attention: if someone tipped, they wouldn't benefit from the 10% cashback incentive that TheMeTooMovement has introduced.

Chalk - you make a good point.  I'm happy to divert 10% of the funds raised here towards the prizes and costs incurred of running the writing contests.  

The tragic thing is, my father was wildly prosperous before he cheated.  He became incredibly wealthy after cheating, but lost everything, including my inheritance.  And no, it was morally correct and an act of justice that my father's entire estate was seized.  I'm not complaining.  But it does leave me in a very bad financial predicament.  

"As for tipping, the 10% cash back could also be applied to this, all it would take was a short memo underlining the amount you’ve just tipped. That is, if the tip was anonymous, they could always attach their name to the tip and the 10% cashback would be completely doable."

I agree that this is indeed doable.  But it rather begs the question: what is the point?   Wouldn't it just be faster to send it to TheMeTooMovement with the note he requested being added, rather than handing it over her, possibly anonymously, and then sending him a memo, a de facto invoice, asking for 10% of said funds back? 

Thank you Chalk but I won't be doing any of that.  I prefer keep this as simple as possible, as things are already slightly out of my comfort zone with needing to calculate donators' 10% cashback and such.  As for your own unwillingness to give, I can respect your decision sir, although I do wish you would reconsider.... maybe this will help change your mind a bit

TheMeTooMovement turns his head, his eyebrow cocked in a confident and sly manner, looking for any nearby coppers.  After seeing none nearby, TheMeTooMovement reaches inside his suit and pulls $100,000 cash from his pocket and slides it casually into Chalk's hand. 

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Commissar, while that does seem very tragic, and I do feel very sorry for you, those actions were taken knowing the consequences could be as severe as possible. If I were you, I would be eternally grateful of the fact that you are allowed on these shores at all, not then widely accepting money to make sure you are okay in this big bad world.

The point is, as I originally believed this to be a fund that was being added to the prize, as that is a cause that is actually worthwhile, it would be a good way to see the total raised, and participants could see what the prize currently stood at, at any time. However, forget I mentioned it, it is obviously far too complicated to understand.

MeToo, while I appreciate your generosity, I cannot accept such a payment. If you would like that money to go to the fund, then please by all means do so. I have arranged to have this sum transferred back to yourself. Please do not take it as a donation towards this fund, and please do not give me any cashback for it.

If you need help calculating 10% cashbacks, please do contact anybody roaming these streets, I'm sure they'll be able to help you with a calculation such as this.

Chalk - why don't you send me the $100k and I'll put it towards the writing contest money?  I'll even match it with $100k of my own, ad the prize fund can be $5.2M?

I'd happily cut you in for 5% of the prize money, once it's awarded, for this initial investment?

Apologies Commissar, I have already transferred the money back to MeToo.

I would be happy to add some of my own money to the fund, once I see the standard of the entries and if they warrant additional prize money that is. As of this moment there appears to only be one entry. I'll take a look around a bit later on and maybe reconsider. Don't feel any need to cut me in on 5% of the prize money though, seeing the streets flourishing with good content is reward enough for me.

Think of this as a performance related bonus. The prize fund, much like a salary has been set before the work is carried out, and will be paid once the work has been completed, however, if you do such an incredible job, you may earn an additional amount, in this case the bonus, as a further prize for the top quality work you have produced.

Would you like me to pin this to your chest, so you can look at it to remind yourself what I have said, before you attempt to badger me into it?

As I have said, the amount will depend on the quality of the entries, and I am not after any cashback.

TheMeTooMovement hangs up the phone inside the corner butcher shop that shares the same street corner that this very conversation is taking place on.  It was his bank alerting him that a sizable deposit of $100,000 had been deposited via a bank transfer from the accountant handling the affairs of a Mr. Chalk, confirming earlier claims made by Chalk himself here on this very corner.  TheMeTooMovement thanks the butcher for letting him use the phone and slips a crisp hundred dollar bill into his blood-soaked apron before exiting the butcher shop to rejoin the debate between CommissarKuku and Chalk.

Mr. Chalk, just got off the phone in there (he cocks his head in the direction of the butcher shop) and my bank says the hundred grand I gave you is back in my account.  As to your request, consider it done.  Your request will be honored, and I wish you good luck in all your future endeavors sir.  

He lights a cigarette and blows smoke rings into the air, dazzling both men and women alike that happen to be standing around.

So now it appears that I have $100,000 of money.  I'm feeling inspired to double it and give it away to someone in need instead of keeping it myself.  Just feels selfish to keep it, ya know?  Who would like it?  Or perhaps you know someone else who could use 200 large that I could give it to?

TheMeTooMovement notices a copper nearby and ducks back into the shadows of the alleyway.

I really cant be bothered to read all of this, am I suppose to be happy about what? Recieving a couple hundred grand? Money has no value to me.

What I did read was:

My father was the richest, and at the time, most powerful mobster in this society.  I am neither of these things.  

Are we really going to go in circles? I am more than happy too: 

1. Yes you were the richest at that time, and only....at that time, we both know why.

2. Self proclaimed "most powerful" but why? Again, we both know why. 

All this boasting, seems like you haven't actually learned your lesson.

But not responding and calling me upset on another thread just proves me right. We both know I am not upset lol, I guess me and a couple people are just being open about what majority of the community think. and the minority well let's just call them sympathiser's.