Purely hypothetically speaking: your purely hypothetical new neighbor did something that warrants him feeling the appropriate consequences for his actions. Purely hypothetically, this something was essentially having the authorities permanently fuck up the pavement outside your home and deprive you of the spot you have parked your purely hypothetical car for over twenty years. What are some purely hypothetical ways to get back at him and make him wish he never moved into your neighborhood?

If he's married you can order a nice bouquet of flowers and have a note on them saying "Thanks for the amazing night, love Samantha." on them. Again, this only works if the neighbor is married. Here's a source link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkqgkXSHae8

Put a tiny bit of scotch tape on his spark plugs, enough so that it covers the ends, but can't be truly seen. His car won't work. At best, they will tell him he needs new plugs. At worst, it can be misdiagnosed and far more costly. Learned that in a mechanic class once...

You guys are funny lol! but if it was left up to me I would say just be yourself. Some neighbors don't like you and don't know why so this is a mental issue that stretches farther than the normal mind.

Hypothetically someone can always anonymously sign other people up for junk mail/marketing lists et al with a well placed donation in their name.  The right donations to the right political organizations and advocacy groups can generate quite a bit of mail!

make some mail order for adult entertainment goods, write extra comments to not have it delivered discretely by a truck that has very big promotion for diltos, toys and what not at a time you know he is not at home. They'll come back again later, making it doubel effective

Write to the most murderous criminal in Prison closest to your location, who will be released soon, write in his name of course, talk some smack, threaten him, then sit back and enjoy.

Offer to do nice things for this purely hypothetical neighbor, promise some things and when he starts to become reliant on the actions, give him contingencies. like, I'm gonna need you to buy me beer. or, gee, that wife of yours seems nice... or put my parking spot back or I burn your place down....

I'd leave one giant strip of lawn unmowed right next to their property line. I know it would drive my neighbor crazy. Could also invite everyone at the bar to an after hours party and give them your neighbors address so they keep knocking at their door. I might even teach my pet that the only place they are allowed to relieve themselves are in the neighbors yard.

Purely hypothetically speaking: My way to deal with this purely hypothetical neighbor would be; start by burning up his car.
If he gets a new car, burn it up as well. Then continue with his business and house.
 

Just use  washing up liquid to squirt a massive cock & balls on the hood of his car last thing at night. By morning it will have had the desired effect even when washed off.

wait until it's a freezing cold winters night, then use your hose pipe to cover your neighbor's drive way with water, cover any steps and pathways, then just wait.

The next morning should be alot of fun to watch them attempt walk on it.

You can literally send them a bag of dicks anonymously.    Here's a helpful link:  https://dicksbymail.com/

I think this would be a good risk-free way to have a little fun.

If they are hosting a party or having a BBQ, order them a male stripper. If that's too risky I guess you could subscrbe them to random stuff that gets delivered weekly or monthly.

Put a tiny bit of scotch tape on his spark plugs, enough so that it covers the ends, but can't be truly seen. His car won't work. At best, they will tell him he needs new plugs. At worst, it can be misdiagnosed and far more costly. Learned that in a mechanic class once...

\

how would you get hood open