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National Dueling Championship - $10,000,000 prize pool Started by: Gerwyn_Price on Jan 19, '22 14:21

There you have it folks - Space-Pole has generously offered to bump up the prize pot for anyone foolish enough to wager against the current reigning world champion... and I'm willing to slightly enhance it EVEN FURTHER, as a result of Gerwyn's response (since I hadn't actually anticipated the dueller taking on the side bet, previously)!

Wager $1m as a spectator, get $2m if you win (plus your initial stake of $1m).
Wager $1m as a participant, and I'll waive your $1m stake.

So, watch the duel with a beer, maybe win $2m profit off the back of a $1m investment. If anyone is confident and able to successfully de-belt the champ, they will get another $2m on top of Gerwyn_Price's $2,000,000 prize fund, with no investment whatsoever! $4m in total, if my math and general understanding is accurate. Lovely stuff.

Thank you Gerwyn_Price for this gambling opportunity (don't look at me like that - we're all degenerate gamblers here), and also to Space-Pole for his generosity! Top work gents!

Report Post Tips: 2 / Total: $40,000 Tip

As I steam ahead into the historic 3rd day of my title run, I find myself thoughtful, reflective even. Will there ever be a run this long again? Will the Hall of Fame be named after me in light of my achievements? Will I ever lose a duel? I laugh at the thought of the last one. Ha ha ha I chortle. That will never happen. I've literally never lost a duel and I'm not going to start today.

I was contacted by the late Falista who assured me they would "beat me" with a friendly wink, but when asked to throw their hat into the ring, they cowardly cried off and took the infinitely inferior, unsanctioned duel with KaraZor-El. There was no fanfare. No side action. It was just two people shooting at each other. Kinda lame. The type of lame duck racket I'd expect from Mafiatrivia1, honestly. Called something dweebish like Duelator too probably. 

Anyway, as I said to Falista before they chowed down on some bang bang ravioli, I'm the Champ for a reason. You can't just turn up on day 1 and be given the belt. Bacon doesn't just polish it for anyone. These opportunities have to be earned through hard work and, in my case, accompanied by meteoric rise through the rigorous ranking system to the summit of the mountain. 

With this in mind, I have produce a handy update on the rankings so that everyone knows the current standings. Here, take a look.

National Dueling Championship Rankings

Champion - Gerwyn_Price

1. Gerwyn_Price (when shooting left handed)

2. Vacant

3. Vacant

4. Vacant

5. Vacant

-

Unranked - Mafiatrivia1

Regional qualifier entrant - @EMHP

As you can see, although it is stacked in here, I will continue to defy the odds and keep this streak going. 

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After listening to the rumblings of the great dart thrower Gerwyn_Price, he smirked as the competition seemed to be a good one with lots of entertainment on the way. However, after a few days, it quickly went to the waist side when no one stepped up and challenged the champion. Will this be the case going forward or will someone jump into the ring? Only time will tell.

"Gerwyn, you are onto something here. I wish you luck in all your duels, if you even get any. I have always lived by the simple fact that there is always someone better, I guess we shall see"

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It seems the common rabble, myself included, are too scared to step up to the champ. Will anyone heed the call? 

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I look forward to seeing how this idea plays out I like it, also be a good time for someone to run a book and get some nice little side bets going, the degenerates around here will love that hell I love it and I'm not even a gambling man although I could be persuaded to part with a little cash in this instance, all we need now are some willing participants.

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Hello gentlemen. I’d like to take this opportunity to announce my intention to to present the champion with a challenge. Like any title shot I’d of course need ample time to train for it. I’ll have more details surrounding the duel challenge at a later date.
 

Mansplaining pulls his gun out and starts waving it around as the crowd of people rush to break the two men up. This generates a great deal of publicity for the potential upcoming duel.

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Bacon began his personal ritual polishing of the belt. It would soon be on display for all the world to admire. At least, he had hoped as much. Maybe a challenger would one day present themselves as an entrant. Who knew?

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I will duel Gerwyn_Price or mansplaining, or anyone who thinks they could match the Baron.
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Glory be to me, the still undisputed Champ. I've had two near duels thus far, one from BaronGreenback who demonstrated that he was over-matched in pretty much every department without me having to even lift a finger and Mansplaining has kindly put me on notice that he will, at some point, maybe, step up to the plate.

Despite the fact one of the crews is even called "The Duelers", I remain alone. Swiped left. Just an aged Wise Guy standing in the dueling circle in the setting sun, rippling biceps casting a shadow like boulders, pistol gripped in undefeated hands. Alas, the calibre of opponents has been somewhat lacking, I admit. My towering reputation, unfortunately too tall; the unwelcome 8ft inflatable giraffe in the garden party. Bacon's used up all his belt polish and has been forced into using his own personal supply of fluid to keep the sheen on it. Desperate times that may have crushed an inferior being, but not old Gezzy.

I'm casting the net out again. Wider this time. I'm determined to get some fish into my boat and bludgeon them to death. Well, not really, I'm planning to shoot them. Still, lets scrap the Wise Guy and below element - any rank, so long as you aren't saddled with hundreds of bag carriers, we can get our party on.

And I'll make it $5,000,000 bounty. 

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Things were admittedly starting to look a little bleak for this Championship, we had a glorious champion and a dearth of challengers. A whale in a goldfish bowl. However, there are whispers of an unheralded challenger coming from the east, brave enough to pit his wits against mine. His name is Honk. I personally have never heard of the man, but one thing I do know is that he must be commended for his bravery. He's never even won a duel, whilst I have never lost one. 

Now that we have found our undisputed number one contender for the title, I have commissioned Lincoln_Lawyer to issue a bout agreement and he has paid me $300 to do so. I am confident this will get to Honk, and we will be having our dance with destiny tomorrow. I presume he needs the extra time to say goodbyes to his loved ones and make sure his affairs are in order. Conversely, I'm so certain of victory, I'm not even taking calls off my Mum and my affairs are in total fucking disarray.

Time to place your bets, offer me early congratulations, and to see if Honk has anything about his person you like the look of. I'll be leaving his corpse for your vultures to feast on when I'm done. I know Rorschach and Space-pole have already tabled some sizable wagers which I am looking forward to seeing cash.

Bacon, I want that belt glinting by sunrise tomorrow. 

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I am pleased to see the renewed interest in this and the copious side action that is going on. Truly marvelous.

Honk, it is time for us to settle the score and see who is the better man. It'll either be me, Gerwyn Price, owner of biceps the envy of the Western world, loser of exactly 0 duels, undefeated, reigning and defending, inaugural and longest reigning champion in dueling history or you, Wise Guy of unremarkable feats. The coin flip will decide who is the victor.

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I'll take your offer Rorschach, I'm putting 1 million on Honk to dethrone the champ and seize the belt straight out from under the time-worn bristles of Bacon's polishing brush. If anybody is going to beat the undefeated, undisputed dueling champion of the world, it's definitely going to be this guy I've never heard of or from. 

Report Post Tips: 3 / Total: $60,000 Tip

If anyone is interested in some smaller action, I'd be interested in placing $250,000 on Gerwyn_Price to win.

And let's not forget about my possible forthcoming challenge for the championship.  Details are still pending, as I am still in the process of training but I will keep everybody updated.

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Taking one last sip of water from my glass, and eating the last morsel of day old bread from my plate, I look in the mirror and ponder what could have been. What life may have led for me if I chose a different route, a more safe route for an nondescript race of bird like myself.

Flapping my wings up in the air and letting out a loud HONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKK, I psych myself up, letting out several further angry honks as I step out into the street and take purposeful strides towards my destiny.

To find out whether I am a goose, a duck or a swan...

Oh wait, no it's not. It's to try and shoot a fat darts player. HONK HONK.

Report Post Tips: 7 / Total: $140,000 Tip

"Question for @Gerywn_Price, does shooting left-handed imply or mean anything in particular?"

Bacon had reviewed his notes and noticed the reigning World Champion had mentioned that fact initially in his event announcement(s). 

Bricktop was decidedly curious if the champion had developed this skill or if it just was his predominant hand. The Alpha Pig-of-a-Man was keen to know if the dueler had any unique abilities such that of being left-handed or not. Moreover, he wanted to confirm this is a criteria wasn't necessary for competition entry, yeah? To his present knowledge, it's just a matter of who shoots first Bacon thought to himself although he wasn't overly sure on the matter related to the dueling events. 

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** Gerwyn_Price

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Congratulations Honk on defeating the now-former champion Gerwyn Price, may he rest in peace. Both men are a credit to the National Dueling Association. And a further congratulations to me - the only man with the insight, expertise, and bravery to stand against the consensus and bet on the challenger Honk. I am wiser and much richer for the experience. Kudos (to me). 

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ROUND #1 OF NDC TOURNAMENT

HONK vs GERWYN_PRICE


Round #1: The duel between Gerwyn_Price and Honk has ended with @Honk as the victor.

TKO/Elimination: Gerwyn_Price 


Bacon then proceeded to hand over the NDC World Champion belt to the new champion, a Senor Honk.

"Is there anyone else? Are you not entertained?" the pig exclaimed with a Cuban cigar clutched between his jaws and inhaling deeply as he glanced around the room. 

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DOWN GOES GERWYN

DOWN GOES GERWYN

Mansplaining's jaw drops in disbelief as just like that, a new champion is crowned.  In the blink of an eye, the entire landscape of the sport changed in an instant.  The face of Dueling had just gone down.  How long had the reign of Gerwyn_Price spanned?  Of course you could trace it back to when he made his initial announcement, but how long had he been defending that belt for prior to that?  The man had never lost a duel before in his life, according to his lore.  And while Mansplaining could find no records to confirm if this was true or not, he chose to believe it.  Gerwyn_Price was important to the sport and to tarnish what he had accomplished by challenging his legend would be uncalled for.  He instead addressed the new champ, Honk

Congrats on your title win Honk, and rest in peace to your predecessor Mr. Gerwyn_Price.  And while fortunately nobody took me up on my $250,000 bet, it doesn't take the sting out of losing a bet, even if only with myself.

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"The coin-flip will decide who will shoot first!" the nasally drawl of Lincoln_Lawyer called out to the assembled gathering. Apparently paying to produce the bout agreements had landed the man the role of being in charge of the contest. 

Cuthbert frowned over as Bacon asked Gerwyn something lame about shooting left handed. He had always hated, Gerwyn, neglectful father that he was and, truth be told, he wasn't particularly fond of his bag carrier, Bacon either. Who cared about the implications of shooting with his left or his right? The man was an arse, constantly bragging about never losing a duel. He never even been in a duel as far as Cuthbert knew, that lying sack of shit. Too busy fannying about with his darts to get himself Made or make any real money for either of his families. Cuthbert spat in Gerwyn's direction, catching the back of Lincoln_Lawyer's jacket instead.

"On three, Gentlemen. I'll flip the coin. Gerwyn, heads. Honk, tails. Winner shoots first. Are we ready?" Lincoln asked, fingering the coin with abandon.

Gerwyn gave a smug nod. Cuthbert had been brought up on tales of how 'the Duel Gods love me' and 'I get heads whenever I want it' and he hoped today would finally be the time this got what was coming to him. Gerwyn caught his eye and gave him a wink. 'I hate you', Cuthbert thought to himself.

Honk, for his part, looked like someone had found him in a gutter and paid him to participate. Maybe they had. Probably they had. That seemed exactly the type of thing Gerwyn would do to massage his own ego, find the village idiot, who right now was honking at the gathered spectators and flapping his arms around, and pay him to lose. 

Lincoln took Honk's gesturing as his agreement and tossed the coin into the air. Cuthbert felt his face tighten as it twirled in the air. Tails, tails, tails. He mouthed it over and over in the seconds that the coin spun. Tails, come on you fucker, tails. Wow, Lincoln must really have flipped that things. Tails, tails. The coin landed. A murmur from the crowd who had gathered around, Cuthbert couldn't see. He strained forwards, pushing a particularly dweeby looking specimen to the ground.

"Hey!" Mafiatrivia1 called from the floor. Cuthbert ignored him. 

"What is it? Who's going first?!" He yelled. He saw Gerwyn's face twitch, he was holding his hands up.

"Now, now, lets wait a minute. Lincoln. That wasn't a good toss. You should do it again. Honk. Wait, Honk! HONK! WAI-" Gerwyn's piteous screams for mercy were drowned out by a single gunshot. He fell to the floor with a thud. The crowd fell silent. 

It started quietly, but Cuthbert couldn't help himself, it bubbled out of him. A little chuckle really. Then it grew and before he knew it he was howling. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA KILLED IN THE FIRST FUCKING ROUND HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" He wheezed between breaths. Bacon looked horrified, belt slung over his should as he tentatively reached for it. Cuthbert felt tears rolling down his cheeks. Gerwyn was dead. The useless buffoon. He'd lost all that money and taken a first round nosedive. 

Lincoln was calling for calm, Rorschach was looking furious. Mafiatrivia1 was still on the floor. Bacon was working his way into believing this was what he wanted all along. There was a new champion. Honk looked like he might eat Gerwyn's shoes. 

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