Mickey clicked out the last few words on his Woodstock Electrite Typewriter, before pulling the page free of the carriage with a satisfying whir. Taking the page he placed it face down on a stack of other pages on his desk, before taking out a Morley^TM and lighting it. Taking a moment to savour the big Country taste, he drained the last gulp of his Whiskey and turned the pages over face up to face him. It had been important to get this all of his chest, to write it down so that there was a clear record of all that had transpired, the pure unadulterated truth. Extinguishing the cigarette he started to read, wanting to make sure that it was all just how he remembered it.

A Long Time ago, in a Galaxy far, far away...

Well last year actually, and in Detroit, but it may have well have been a long time ago in a distant galaxy. Truth be told, it had all started that fateful day when he came to New York, but that part of the story had already been told, was already a part of the public record. They'd all gone to Detroit to make something of themselves, to make something... of the city. SatoruGojo, HeadHunterX, ShinigamiK, R-L_Stine, Freyja, Bacon, Lincoln_Lawyer, and of course CLO. Friends, hands, Crew Leaders and Godfathers. They took the destroyed city and moulded it with their hands, tore it down to its bare bones, and built a true thing of beauty from the rotting corpse. It was in Detroit where CLO took Godfather for the first time. We had hoped that the old man arising to the ultimate position of power would have sorted his issues, but in fact they had only just begun. You see CLO had what people in years to come would call and addictive personality. If you could smoke it, inject it, consume it, ingest it or ride it, CLO was there with bells and whistles on. Mickey hadn't known at the time but it had been part of the reason Dan had sent them to Detroit in the first place. He'd been worried that if news got out it would weaken his position. Ordinarily the person would be expunged with extreme prejudice, but Dan owed CLO big time. CLO at his best was magnificent. Everyone had seen the home movies of him wrestling Polar Bears. There was the painting of him Riding a moose through 2 feet of snow, carrying a Winchester rifle in one hand, with nary a stitch on his back. Not to mention that every morning he would get up and swim 25 miles in the river, in all weathers, rain, snow or shine. First the Hudson, then the Detroit river, and now the Chicago. Women wanted to be him, and men wanted to be with him, he was just that kind of person.  

But with supreme power comes supreme avarice. Coke was king, and CLO had nostrils like the Blackwall tunnel. Mickey could still remember the day he had had to go into GFC Gojo's office and tell him they were haemorrhaging $20 million a day. Gojo was apoplectic with rage, there were bulging veins, spittle flying, small hands banging on tables... had anyone else ever noticed how tiny his hands were? Mickey had always surmised that's why he walked around with his hands behind his back... So yeah, spittle was flying, chairs getting kicked over, and there were a whole lot of Fucks and cunts and sons of a bitches. How could they be so deep in the shit, they were moving a metric fuck ton of gear, gambling was up, loan sharking was up, stealing candy from babies was up. And then it dawned on him, fucking CLO, hoovering up Coke like Daniel Baldwin with an Atomic powered nose. If he had a Moustache and a beater bar he could be a Hoover, beats as it sweeps, as it cleans. Something would have to be done before he brought the whole of Detroit down. Luckily, things had been in place for a long time, just in case such an eventuality occurred. A long, long time. You see the Kuku bloodline isn't real, well yes it is real, but they are still serving life in Sing Sing for a particularly horrific crime they perpetrated a couple of years ago. Dagda had employed a cadre of Romany Gypsies to play the part of this notorious bloodline. A carefully orchestrated feud had been 'created' between Mickey and these fake Kukus to hoover up rewards from city hall, rewards that had a rather high intrinsic value. FatFury almost gave the game away when he came to the streets proclaiming that the Kuku lineage was not just one person but a collection of people working to a common goal. Thankfully some clever deflection by Mickey and Roya quickly put people off the scent, and FatFury's theory drowned when he took a sleep with the fishes. 

People all over the country were playing out schemes and cons, ordered by someone high up in their family, someone that they didn't really know the identity off, Fluffiest_Tummy ran the old Snowball scam, Sunset was skimming off the top from his Casino, PlagueGuy rolled out the Kuku Matriarch and put her to work on the streets of Vegas and all the money was funnelled into a secret slush fund. Snitches were paid off, Cops were bribed, Witness statements were forged, and poison was poured into peoples ears. The whole reason was to orchestrate the fall of Chicago. It was time to move CLO on in order to save Detroit, but again Goju owed the man so much that he wanted to keep him near, just not too near. And so in a decisive battle, ably assisted by Silverlight who was instrumental in persuading his fellow Chicagoans to fight the good fight, only to switch sides at the last minute, Chicago was raised to the ground. Goju knew that CLO would be unable to resist a challenge, so whilst we were all celebrating, drinking, taking coke, Goju turned once more to business. It was decided that Chicago would fall to Detroit to rebuild as a reward for all our support of New York over the years. Obviously someone would have to be Godfather Chairman. He had already decided to send the Husband and Wife team of Micky and Freyja to Chicago to start the rebuild, he just needed someone to take the role of Godfather Chairman. AS CLO was already Godfather, it was obvious that he wouldn't want the job, as he would lose his status as Godfather and have to fight his way back to the top. At this CLO jumped up, knocking his 40 gram line of coke over Macarena, who looked like Caspar the Friendly ghost, only with tits, and announced that he would take the city and mould it to his will. And so it was. CLO stepped down as Godfather in Detroit, and came to live in Chicago with Freyja and myself.

I of course being of the superior intellect was the first to take Godfather of the new city, and I have run it with confidence since. CLO rose to the new challenge, slowly at first, kicking a 2500kg a day coke habit is not easy. I had heard that there was the possibility of a drug used to treat alcoholism, disulfiram, having some success in the treatment of Cocaine addiction, so that's when we hit upon the idea of making people think CLO was an Alcoholic. The initial story was leaked through AdmiralAckbar to one of our fake Kuku operatives, and later confirmed by myself in an open letter to the whole city. No one could know that CLO was a recovering drug addict. But slowly, as the drugs were purged from his system, mostly in a way that made Constipated really envious, the old Moose riding CLO re-emerged, and only 24 hours ago, he took on his figurehead role as GFC of Chicago. Now the hard work lay ahead, making sure that a repeat of New York and Detroit were not repeated in Chicago. Not even an animal like CLO would be able to make a 3rd run for Godfather, and we were running out of cities to hide him in.

Mickey sighed and lit another Morley^TM everything was as correct and accurate as he could remember. It was just a pity that his manuscript would never see the light of day, and the true events of what happened here would ultimately be lost to the sands of time. Holding his lighter beneath the pages, he watched them burn before dropping them into the waste paper bin beside his desk. Sliding another page into the type writer, he begins to type.

4th March 1953

 

Dear Godfather CLO,

Please let me begin by congratulating you on your magnificent achievement. Few men in this life ever reach the heights of Godfather, but for someone to reach this pinnacle twice in the one lifetime is truly amazing. You deserve the title of Godfather Chairman of Chicago and all the plaudits that go with it. Whilst i have already pledged my loyalty to you that fateful day back in New York, today as Godfather of South Side I reaffirm that loyalty to you and swear that I will defend you and our city with my own life if needs be.

You have been a true and loyal friend for almost as long as I can remember, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me to accompany you on this journey.

 

Sincerely your friend and confidant,

 

J. Michael Haller Jnr.

Constipated wipes his ass, jumps in the shower and gets dressed to attend one of the most impressive moments he has witnessed in his lifetime. Who would have thought, CLO could battle his addiction and get over the obstacles required to reach Godfather once again?  

CLO, not only am I impressed with your tenacity to get off the shitter, and get the job done, I am very proud of you. I can see exactly why my grandfather grew to have the upmost respect for you. He was a man of good judgement and I walk in his shoes. I know with every fiber in me you are worthy of being the Godfather Chairman of Chicago. It is an absolute honor and pleasure knowing you. 

Congratulations! You earned and deserved this glorious moment. And I defy anyone to say otherwise. 

Diego listens carefully to the lawyer's detailed and interesting speech before adding his two cents. 

Congratulations Godfather CLO. What an interesting life you've had. My grandfather told me stories of you as a young gangster valiantly shooting at your friend in New York.

At the time I didn't quote understand why you'd want to do that. But now I see that it was all an act of loyalty. 

I wish you continued success as you help to grow and develop the Windy City. 

Fluffiest had been watching the windy city from afar for a while now. Somehow the windy weather there was a pain in the ass and always got his majestic fur all tangled up. But sometimes exceptions had to be made, and his good friend CLO getting the Godfather throne of Chicago was one of those occasions.

After a lot of drivel, and droning speech by that dry and sketchy as fuck lawyer, he had already taken 5 naps by then. He decided it was enough, he walked over to CLO, ate some salmon off people's plates on his way and stood by his friend as he also seemed to be nodding off towards the end of the speech.

Well my nordic friend, you wear fur coats that rival my own in your pursuit of challenges you seem to always beat, but now it is time for your secret passion to come out!!! Highly customized and body fitted Italian suits!! You are now a man of standing and no longer need to get yourself too dirty or worked up anymore. Surely you have enough minions to boss around, just sit back enjoy and watch the sunset as it reflects in your perfectly polished boots basking in the sunlight. Surely good for nothing hydra is at least going to get that righ!!

Congratz my friend, may your reign be long, prosperous and cast a shadow over Detroit for you are the Golden Boy!!