BIGPUN AKA BIGPUNISHER MAKES HIS WAY TO A PAY-PHONE. HE IS OUT OF BREATH. HIS THICK FINGERS CLASP THE RECEIVER LIKE IT'S A TOOTHPICK. HE STRUGGLES TO DIAL IN THE CORRECT NUMBERS AND MAKES SEVERAL ATTEMPTS. ULTIMATELY, HE IS SUCCESSFUL. HE ALWAYS IS, EVENTUALLY. HE IS A PROFESSIONAL. THE BEST AT WHAT HE DOES. AND WHAT HE DOES IS MURDER. 

"Chief, mission accomplished. Target eliminated."

THE CHIEF PRATTLES SOMETHING BACK AT BIGPUN. ONLY BIGPUN CAN HEAR IT BECAUSE IT'S HIS FAT ELEPHANT EAR PRESSED UP AGAINST THE PHONE AND NOT YOURS. THIS GOES ON FOR ABOUT A MINUTE. BIGPUN NODS ALONG, HIS CHIN CUPPED BETWEEN THE THUMB AND INDEX FINGER OF HIS FREE HAND. FOR A LONG TIME BIGPUN THOUGHT THAT ONE WAS CALLED THE POINTER FINGER BUT THAT WAS WRONG. HE WAS WRONG SOMETIMES. BUT NOT WHEN IT CAME TO WHAT HE DOES. AND WHAT HE DOES...IS MURDER. 

"Adorkable was no match for me. I was too mighty. Too powerful. Phase 1 is complete."

BIGPUN HANGS UP THE PHONE. HE IS SORE, FROM HIS FRIEND HEPATITISC TICKLING HIM TOO MUCH, DESPITE TELLING HIM TO QUIT IT. DISCIPLINE WAS AN INTEGRAL TO THE CONTRACT KILLER. IT IS ONE OF THE MANY RULES HE LIVES BY. HIS CODE. 

BIGPUNISHER LOOKS AROUND. IT WAS ALMOST TIME FOR PHASE 2: THE SECOND KILLING. MURDER WAS AS NORMAL AS BREATHING FOR BIGPUN. HE WAS A KILLER. HE STOPPED FOR A MOMENT TO THINK OF HIS FATHER, NETFLIX PUN. A GOOD MAN. AND HE, BIG PUN, WAS NETFLIX'S THE KILLER. YES. IT ALL MADE SENSE. 

HE CLOSES HIS EYES AND RUMINATES OVER HIS CODE. THE KILLER'S CODE. SO IMPORTANT, FOR KILLERS. 

BIGPUN YOU MOTHERFUCKER, I KNEW YOU COULDN'T BE TRUSTED.

THAT ONE TIME WHEN SOMEONE STOLE MY PASTRAMI SANDWICH FROM THE HQ FRIDGE, AND I ASKED YOU IF IT WAS YOU, YOU SAID "no" WITH A SHIT EATING GRIN. THERE WAS MAYONNAISE ON YOUR FACE, YET YOU STILL DENIED HAVING STOLEN MY DELICIOUS LUNCH. IT WAS SUCH A BOLDFACED LIE, YOU FAT FUCKING FRAUD.

FROM THAT MOMENT ONWARDS I'VE ALWAYS HAD MY EYE ON YOU. I KNEW THIS DAY WOULD COME.

I HOPE YOU FALL OFF A TALL SOFA.

     Jan 05, 20:21:54     Your accountant has received payment of $500 from BigPun. The note "500" was included.
     Jan 02, 08:27:58     Your accountant has received payment of $900 from BigPun. The note "Toots" was included.
     Dec 26, 16:18:23     Your accountant has received payment of $800 from BigPun. The note "Yes" was included.
     Dec 25, 08:38:03     Your accountant has received payment of $900 from BigPun. The note "Murry Chrastmus" was included.
     Dec 22, 10:12:21     Your accountant has received payment of $600 from BigPun. The note "Clean the poop out of your pants" was included.
     Dec 18, 02:30:59     Your accountant has received payment of $500 from BigPun. The note "Sup" was included.
     Dec 12, 14:27:39     Your accountant has received payment of $900 from BigPun.
     Dec 03, 12:04:37     Your accountant has received payment of $400 from BigPun.
     Dec 02, 08:34:51     Your accountant has received payment of $900 from BigPun.
     Dec 02, 08:34:40     Your accountant has received payment of $100 from BigPun.
     Nov 26, 12:40:45     Your accountant has received payment of $400 from BigPun.
     Nov 25, 11:02:58     Your accountant has received payment of $600 from BigPun.
     Nov 16, 10:20:15     Your accountant has received payment of $300 from BigPun.
     Nov 02, 07:55:09     Your accountant has received payment of $1,100 from BigPun.
     Oct 31, 07:27:03     Your accountant has received payment of $700 from BigPun. The note "Yes" was included.

I WILL NOT TAKE YOUR DISGUSTING BRIBE MONEY EITHER, YOU FAT GREASEBALL.

     Jan 07, 16:39:41     Your accountant has made payment of $9,600 to BigPun. The note "pastrami sandwich stealing fuck" was included.

I'll pay $80m for this WS

MISTERKUKU there is no witness statement. BigPun allegedly fell off a tall sofa and tragically met his end.

The room this happened in was a locked room. There were no witnesses. The door was locked from the inside. The windows were locked as well. There were no hidden escape routes.

It's a mystery as far as we're all concerned.

Transistor unfurls a note from his pocket and hands it to MISTERKUKU

Jan 07, 17:05:53

You WACKED! BigPun.

 I'll take that in cash please.

dam tht was smooth mr Transistor, can i get yall anything since yall chose my tavern to do these things?

Knuckles watches the unfolding of everything that happened before him. Shocked by the murders committed by BigPun. Then, Transistor unfolds the witness of the killing of BigPun…

Mate, that was the single best action I have ever seen. Transistor is an absolute boss!

This is the best explanation of anything that’s going on of anything I have seen in the streets lately. congratulations. 
 

not that I endorse roguing - but I do enjoy a pastrami sandwich.

Won't somebody think of poor Bryan-?

Albino watches the commotion from a distance from the back seat of his chauffeured car. He was tired, it had been an incredibly long day and he was after an excuse.

"You seeing this, Frank?" Albino rolls the window down, nudging the young associate to grab his attention. "The big man's on business."

The pair watch menacingly. "$80 million... That could come in handy."

Albino turns his head, looking at Frank for a moment before continuing. "Is that hammer still in the back?" He grins. "Come on..."

They exit the car - Albino begins to whistle a catchy tune as they mosey over to the small crowd. 

"Evening boss." Albino extends his arm, firmly shaking Godfather Transistor's hand.

"Gents." He nods at the others before facing MISTERKUKU directly.

"Am I hearing this right, boss?" Tilting his head slightly. "He's got some money for ya?" A cheeky smile appears behind his luscious beard. "That's good of him."

The mood was sombre. Albino was getting excited.

"Well? Where is it then?" Albino straightens MISTERKUKU's collar. "This man is not someone you keep waiting." He leans in. 

"So where's his fucking money?"

You expect me to believe this is real, you Albino?

I believe when Mr Transistor made the shot, there were several public witnesses to the event, MISTERKUKU. In fact, everyone in the vicinity could hear him shouting "Bad Dog" as he put BigPun down. Least, so I've heard. 

Slash, with all due respect (seeing how I am but a coquettish capo), I thought we had already concluded that the death of BigPun (THAT WORTHLESS GLUTTON) was naught but a locked room murder. I can imagine that the people are very eager to try and come up with their own solutions and theories of the whodunit, but the evidence I have seen so far is inconclusive.

I think to solve this mystery we need an expert on the case.

Call Agatha Christie.

It's clear to me that BigPun (RIP) did not work alone.  HepC provided covering fire, and it seems like the late Kuku provided typically ineffectual covering for the second hit, killing Bryan- whilst not even realising he was unsponsored in fury at failing to protect BigPun.

Let this be a lesson to you all, where there is Kuku, there will always be dedicated gunmen ready to carry out targeted assassinations (or using unconnected proxy targets when difficulty arises).

For my part, as a billionaire, I am left distraught in the knowledge that I am an outcast.  Friendless and alone, with no power and a permanently blemished reputation.

Who was BigPun?  Why did he kill the targets he did?

I will pay $38m to the man who kills the man who killed HepatitisC.

We will not tolerable this.

Conversely, $8m to the man who killed Kuku

I know who killed kuku so please send me $6 million up front and the rest for the statement.

An uneven hairline could be the result of traction alopecia, pattern hair loss, or a variety of other causes including genetics

Japana, proof, or begone