Oderus stands by the crowd shaking his head in shock and disbelief at the conversation that is taking place before his very eyes

Despite the innuendo that is being blatantly discussed here in the streets, I do believe that this was originally a discussion about a hot dog stand. Any chance of anyone here answering a serious question maybe??? For instance what is the size of the buns that you will be sticking these teenie weinies between?

Oderus awaits an answer, happy with himself for steering the conversation in a more wholesome direction

Stands in the crowd giggling as everyone reads out their letters

It's just... If i didn't know better you could all be talking about...

The man giggles again

Nevermind, you probably wouldn't get it.

Mr. Oderus,

Clearly if we are to discuss a topic on a wholesome direction you would point out having a whole wheat bun rather then white. But just like pointing out the quality of lettuce garnishings in a taco is poor, the buns aren't so much the problem as much as the quality and size of the meat. What good is the grip of the buns if the meat just falls out? Or worse yet the size of the meat is so big the bun just breaks. It wouldn't be a fun tasty experience I must digress.

Reasonable,

Petra

As Timber finishes her New York weiner she starts to jot down a letter of her own.

Dear Mr. Negative,

After hearing about the teenie weenies I decided to try one. I would like to know about the sanitary conditions. I was not at all impressed to find that I had gotten a hair stuck in my mouth. Clearly this is unhygenic and unsanitory. I must ask you, what are your plans for sanitation methods?

Sincerely,

TimberRattlesnake.

Mr Oderus,

Indeed this is an issue to be sought out. I am now also quite curious to the size and also the quality of the buns that Mr Negative will be stick his Tennie Weenies into. The quality in itself is quite an issue, as we want the buns themselves to be clean, healthy looking and appetising (you know the sort, that you can really get your teeth into), yet at the same time, flavoursome. Of course as Mr Petra has pointed out to you, the quality and size of the meat matters too, but quite frankly I am amazed the buns have not been digressed upon.

Yet again I may have an idea for this. If Mr Negative is only strictly selling Teenie Weenies and not the buns to go with them, I have a few contacts who have a healthy dose of good buns, that as far as I know have never made people feel ill, and do not have the putrid smell coming from them that indeed happens within some rotting stores. I would be willing to set up a store, so that Mr Negative may stick his Teenie Weenies into the buns I provide.

If I am most mistaken and Mr Negative is providing good buns himself, then I would advise him to reconsider his position, as buns that are from good stock are hard to find. We should advise him on this matter together.

Anxiously,

Identity

Dear Morgan et al.

I must first protest, whilst my Steaky meat smells of cheese, this
is merely what I am serving as it is popular by those who visit our
fine city and I am shocked Morgan does not realise the quality of the
cheese steaks we serve. Our meat is great, though it is true at mine
and my brothers Headquarters the meat we serve is rather large.

Regarding Petra's discussion of the buns, it does seem from what I
have seen in these cities that the buns are rather weak! I however
think the best way to fix this would be to serve our big meat in the tacos. I mean who wants meat in buns anyway?

Faithful to his big meat,

Il Siciliano

I agree!   My fresh, warm tacos are perfect for stuffing large pieces of meat.

I have to agree!  Philly does have alot of beef to offer. These large slabs of meat can be put on your grill until all the juices have drained and the beef gets soft.  Now that's some good meat!

I would encourage all to come visit Philly and enjoy these long hoogies!

Leiah walks past the crowd and couldn't help but stop and listen for a bit. She shakes her head and swallows a laugh then continues walking.

Sigh...

Looks over at leiahyk and replies

That's not the only thing you should swallow.  Try out some LA weiners!

Laughs as she hears GoodFeIIa talk about the LA weiners.

Dear Sir. I eagerly recommend the New York weiners. Not saying the LA ones aren't good as I am sure there are a few good vendors out there but I simply cannot resist New York style weiners.

Dear Ms. Rattlesnake,

Perhaps you should have inquired sooner about the differences between LA and NY style weiners.  In a previous letter to a Mr. Hayes, I summarized a story that was told to me by a woman who had a bad experience in New York at a local vendor there.  To say the least, not only was she unsatisfied, but the experience gave her a horrid disease of which she is now, permanently scarred (at least emotionally).  If you should have any further inquiries, please go and read the previous letter; I am sure it will humor you.   Regardless of this, I must implore you to seek an LA style weiner.  If you need to find one quickly, I would be happy to oblige.

Emphatically,

GoodFeIIa

Dear Marietta,

I'm afraid that, once again, your business sense has failed you.  As you can see, the very mention of Teenie Weenies has created a bit of a stir.  I'm sure that we can reach some sort of compromise.  If extremely large sausages are more your taste, I would be able to provide them to you, at no additional charge. 

There have been rumblings about the sanitation, or lack thereof, of our hot dog carts.  I assure you that the health inspector has been duly paid off, and there will be no official reprimand from the health department.  Also, I recieved complaints about the odor created by the cooking of our very small weiners.  Let me personally assure you, that it is not our meat that you're smelling.  Our meat does not smell bad.  Although our vendors may, on occasion, forget to bathe, due to their enthusiasm for selling the product. 

Love always,

Mr. Negative

Dear Potential Customer,

We value your business.  Let me personally assure you that, if one Teenie Weenie doesn't satisfy your appetite for weiners, then several of them will.

-Mr. Negative

Dear Mr Negative,

Does you're teeny weeny come with cheese ?

Interested

Duracell

Dear GoodFeIIa,

I'm sorry to inform you that I have tried a weiner from each city. I still feel that New York is just the best. LA a close second. I do however appreciate your offer, but I must refrain. 

Saddened,

TimberRattlesnake.