fs walked into his office and threw his hat in the chair in rage.

"What happened, boss?" Tianna asked him as he was visibly frustrated.

"Oh, just another day at the casino where the house handed it to me.  You know, I'm really starting to realize it's called the house because they want to take mine!"

He began to walk back and forth in his office, thinking deeply.

"Ha, I've got an idea to get back at them."  He let out a chuckle as he walked to his desk and started working on his announcement.

He finished what he was working on, and grabbed his coffee to head to main street.  He found a nice spot in the middle of the square.

"Good afternoon, everyone.  I come today with a very exciting opportunity.  Has the house taken everything from you?  We all know the detriment it has done to worm, but I'm sure we've all been impacted.  And I think it's about damn time we take it back.  So, I'm announcing a new competition!  Starting April 07, I'm introducing Beat the House - A dicing competition.  I'll put some fliers around town, but here's the first one with some information.  I hope you all join in on taking down the house!"

fs grabbed his announcement and tacked it to an announcement board.

Announcing:

Beat the House - A Dice Competition

Have you wanted a chance to take it to the house?  Now's your time!

Some details:

Qualifier Stage Dates: April 07 00:00:00 - April 14 00:00:00

How to enter: Beat the house in a Tops bet and score over 900.

Every person who qualifies will earn $250,000

 

Tournament winner will take home: $20 million and 50 creds.
 

For some more details, follow me to this alley over here.

TinyTim was rather intrigued by this proposition. Fortunately, even though he is a small child, this rapscallion has his own fake ID. He staggers his way through the casino, past all the losers, losing their entire life’s savings. He recognised one. 
 

Hi paul_finch. 
 

At exactly 18:09pm, he threw down $100k and challenged the house. The outcome read as follows: 

“You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 726 and you rolled 983. You won $200,000 cash.”

With a smug grin, he turns to leave the building. Nap time was approaching and nobody wants to see a cranky TinyTim. 

Don't forget folks, we do not start the qualifier stage until 00:00:00 on the 7th of April.  All entries before that will not qualify, though I do appreciate the enthusiasm.

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 404 and you rolled 947. You won $200,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

Perhaps this was unsurprising to anyone who had ever met this particular worm in their lifetime, but he was a creature of the casinos and his one vice outside of alcoholism and promiscuity was that of gambling; you would almost always see him sitting around at one of the many blackjack tables around Vegas or one of the back room poker games in New York, but what you wouldn't see was a worm that particularly knew how to play any of these things well.

That's why when he finally did win at the dice tables of Mister House, it was a bit shocking to even him.

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 339 and you rolled 919. You won 6.00 credits. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

Just ignore how much he had lost before that win, it wasn't very important, now was it? You know what they say: The only man who loses is one who never tries at all. Also, I'm going to throw in something about toasters to make JubTheNub happy. So what did this mean? Well, I suppose it meant that he was now entered into whatever this weird and poorly explained event was. That's cool.

That's when House said the most startling words that worm had ever heard, ones that never ended well for him:

"Want to play again?" What's the worst that could happen?

Credit Balance: 0.68

Entries are now officially open.  Feel free to post here or message me.  Once I have verified your entry, I'll let you know and send you the cash.  Good luck everyone and kick the house's ass!

Genevieve took her winning slip from the gentleman at the casino. Looking over the words on the paper she grinned, "Fantastic, additional winnings are ahead of me." Genevieve said as she tucked the slip of paper into her jacket pocket. "Thank you kindly," the woman said to the gentleman before making her way to the streets. 

Genevieve arrived and nodded towards FutureStealer before moving towards him. Fishing the scrap of paper out of her pocket she offers it over to the man holding the contest. "I believe you'll find that this qualifies," Genevieve said to FutureStealer . 

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 403 and you rolled 905. You won $100,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

Taking a step back, Genevieve looked around to see who else had been winning, or perhaps losing when it came to the glorious evil that was known as dice around these parts.  

Kenny arrives drunk and grabs the note from his pocket and THROWS IT ON THE GROUND.

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 492 and you rolled 945. You won $20,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

"I'M AN ADULT."

worm sat there and watched the pathetic roll of KennyRusso, the kind of rolls that you'd want if you were some sort of amateur dice roller, but the worm was a bit more advanced than that. He had been training with some of the greats in the mountains for the past six years in order to craft the perfect spin.

"Are you ready?"

He may have lost all of his expensive credits a few hours ago, but that didn't matter anymore. All that mattered was this final creme de la roll to enter himself into the history books of high rolls. Allowing his elbows to point perfectly as he was taught in his fourth year of dicing camp, he let loose the furious dice.

1. You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 12 and you rolled 970. You won $20,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

He had tamed them perfectly. With this amazing roll, the worm would surely win.

Or someone would beat him.

Who cares?

Jub had decided to abstain from entering this competition as he considered dice gambling to be a work of the devil. Recently he had been peer pressured to 'hit the dice' by his superior KennyRusso and his cousin (or father? (or brother?)) MichaelRusso. Jub got absolutely felted, losing all the money entrusted to him in the blink of an eye.

Being the spiteful cretin he is Jub couldn't help but heckle the gamblers during their play.

"worm you may outnumber us all with your rolls when it comes to dicing but there is one type of roll which JUB cannot be outmatched in. EVER."

"That roll, is the fat-roll. I dare you to find someone with a higher fat-roll count than me. Go on, I'll wait. And do not consult the ancient oracle of alphabet soup for an answer, that is cheating."

Roya had many vices. Women, smoking, drinking, all the drugs she could get her hands (or nose) on. Incredibly, gambling was the worst of them. And when she found out that FutureStealer launched a dicing competition, her hands trambled. She knew she had to join! 

It was exactly 22:27 in our shores when she tossed the dice! She held her breath and waited... 

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 715 and you rolled 949. You won $100,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

She won! She gathered her reward and her winnings and went somewhere where she could indulge her other vices.

I am sorry for this worm. It was a good effort. 

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 4 and you rolled 965. You won 2.00 credits. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

 These old bone dice of mine can't fail. 

Well after a rousing first day, we've got some competition heating up for the baddest beat, and we've done a decent hit to the house.  But I know we can do more.  There are still plenty of days to get in on the action.  Here is our current leaderboard:

1. 961 - Wellerman
2. 958 - worm
3. 939 - MarkCorrigan
4. 700 - TinyTim
5. 649 - KennyRusso
6. 502 - Genevieve
7. 234 - Roya

Milton calmly dusted the soot off of his shoulder; making his way through the crowd trying to seem inconspicuous. Someone had moved his desk again, so the day started off rather poor. He was looking for something exciting to take his mind off of things. Reaching up, he grabbed a flyer off of the post and started to look it over.

$250,000? to anybody? all they had to do was roll 900+ and beat the dealer...with no bet limitation?!?

Free money Milton thought to himself, as he laughed his way over to the dice table. Where he quickly realized, things don't always go as you planned. 

23:46 <&MRBot> MiltonWaddams accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 544 and MiltonWaddams rolled 59. House won $20,000 cash. MiltonWaddams is on a losing streak of 10.

After gaining his balance again, Milton wiped a bead of sweat off of his forehead. Wondering how much further he could possibly go. He took a minute to catch his breathe before heading back to the table. Afraid to look at the inevitable outcome, Milton shielded his eyes as he took another try throwing the dice. 

23:48 <&MRBot> MiltonWaddams accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 663 and MiltonWaddams rolled 962

Reaching inside his jacket pocket Milton pulled out his lucky red swingline stapler. Questioning why he hadn't brought it to the forefront sooner.

There was never a doubt. House is lucky I forgot about the stapler. 10 losses in a row is a fluke, god speed to whoever I run into the first round.

Putting the stapler back in a secure spot, which almost seemed like a holster at this point. Milton mumbled a few muffled words to himself as he made his way through the ever growing crowd.

At exactly 14:07 and Roya rolled the dice again, hoping she would get in a better place on the leaderboard:

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 11 and you rolled 994. You won $100,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

Another day and another good run of luck at the casino, specifically the dice table. After another streak of victory, the woman realized that the men standing around were starting to make low-level grumbles about her winnings, and thus Genevieve considered this her cue to leave. Gathering her things she said her farewells to those she had been speaking to and quickly made her way back to the street. Handing over another slip of paper to FutureStealer the woman, Genevieve, felt that she was in a solid position to take it all this time. 

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 559 and you rolled 943. You won $20,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

Figuring he would try his luck Vaugh blew on the dice, threw them and ended up with.

You accepted House's Swap dice bet for $1,000,000 cash. You rolled a 247,263, paying them $247,263 cash. They rolled a 918,572, paying you $918,572 cash. You won $671,309 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

What in the fuck is this competition? One that I almost win with an amazing roll but get it forcefully taken away by a Pirate who destroys my will to live by three points? What are three points? It's a number that's almost so infinitesimally small we can't even call it a number at all, and what's next, two or even one? Are we as a society going to allow a worm to lose by three tiny fractions of a point? Is this where we're at in society where everything is one big joke and nothing even fucking matters?

The worm drops his bottle of booze to the floor and pushes it behind his long shapely body-- looking around at the people who have gathered to play the dicing games for a moment, he winces and begins to speak again, not allowing anyone or anything to stop him from speaking his mind when it comes to mafia-related competitions.

I'm calling it right now, I want to stop this competition because the results aren't to my liking and if anyone has anything to say about that, then, well, I guess we'll have to agree to disagree and do a good old-fashioned debate. We're entering dangerous waters now though that I don't really want to explore, especially when my enemy is a pirate and so they would surely have the upper hand in navigation.

A few tears dropped from his eyes as he puts his hands into his credit purse and pulls out nothing but air, how could House have done this to him for the nineteenth time this year? Where was the love? They spent so much time together, and yet, there was nothing but ambivalent feelings, at best, in the air. 

Who is with me in this call of a forfeit? 

For-FEIT!

For-FEIT!

For-FEIT!

Walking around in a large circle around the perimeter of the competition, he threw up his muscular arms after every chant and waited for someone to join along. If enough people spoke down about this fucked up game, then maybe it would be all put behind us once and for all and the worm could get back to running his crew with a tight fist filled with credits and cash.

Vaughn returns after accidently making the wrong bet so he decided to roll the dice again. Hoping this time he would do it the right was so he would not mess up. He already had egg on his face from the first time and didn't want it a second time cause those eggs could easily have been made into a nice omelete.

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 142 and you rolled 617. You won $2,000,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit. Click here to rebet.

Kenny watches as the worm agitates the crowd and starts chanting with them. His leader was a very charismatic worm, good looking and muscular, so the masses would easily fall for his charms. But not Kenny. He knew better from seeing all the shit the worm was up to around the outside of the HQ. He knew the real worm.

As the crowd started to chant louder, Kenny decided to shut the worm down from causing too much trouble, he saw an opportunity to rush into the crowd and deliver an uppercut to the worm's face. With powerful force you could hear the BAM echoing through the streets. After that he tried to dig into the soil and went head first on the pavement and knocked himself unconscious.

With that, some punk comes over and grabs Kenny's note and shows it to FutureStealer.

You accepted House's Tops dice bet. House rolled 54 and you rolled 937. You won $20,000 cash. You gave the dealer 1% of the profit.