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Brawl For Fall Started by: Sniffler on Oct 25, '23 18:07

Sniffler's cane clicked as he walked, clicking like the hands ticking on a clock. It was time. Sniffler placed his hand in his pocket, clenching the embroidered handkerchief that was so dear to him. His heart pounded in his chest, his blood began to throb in his ears and his chest began to rise and fall with increased rhythm. Sniffler looked down at his companion Keith. Keith and Sniffler exchanged knowing glances. As Johnny Hobo quieted the crowd Sniffler smiled seeing Johnny still wearing the goat-tattered fedora. Ginger approached Sniffler. Placing his arm on Sniffler's shoulder he whispered its time boss. Sniffler nodded. It was time. It was time for excitement, it was time for joy, it was time for the show to begin once more.

Sniffler stepped forward.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I am a smartly dressed anteater. Today signals the beginning of a new journey. A journey I invite you all to be a part of. A journey that will culminate in one champion. Today I launch the Brawl For Fall. A boxing competition that is open to all entrants and there is no entry fee. More detailed rules and prizes can be found on THIS POSTER.”

Harvey pasted the poster to the wall behind Sniffler.

“With support from the gods and a few old friends along the way, I believe that this competition will be memorable. All matches will receive full match commentary along with other exciting engagements along the journey. I know some of you out there, others I don’t. However, I ask you all to step forward and prove that you have what it takes to take home the World Mafia Boxing Championship. We are also looking for additional guest commentators. Should you wish to partake as a competitor, commentator or both please step forward and do so at the end of this speech. I thank you all for taking the time to read this post and I look forward to this journey we are going to undertake together. If you have any further questions, please do not hesitate to contact me. Entry will be closed at midnight on the 3rd of November. With rounds planned to start on the 6th”

Sniffler stepped back into the shadows to await the reception of his announcement.

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Sniffler had just finished his announcement and Gillian shrieked in joy, clapping maniacally. A Mafia Boxing Championship! She loved those. She absolutely loved all the violence and of course, the opportunity to commit it without any consequences and still get prizes for it was perfect! She couldn't wait to participate and kick people's asses! (or get hers kicked, she loved some good BDSM).

"Sniffler, thats wonderful news and an awesome idea! Count me in!!!!!!!!!" Gillian screamed, while jumping up and down like an excited child and swinging her crocodile tail!

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9sM listened intently to Sniffler as he made his announcement. This was certainly something right up NineSecondMan's street. He noticed a woman nearby making lots of noise and clapping enthusiastically. She then screamed out something that 9sM was unable to hear and began jumping up and down. Seeing a small puddle surrounding her, 9sM stepped away a little before raising his hand.

"I would be more than happy to support this event as a commentator, I believe it could be a great success and hope that you consider me as an option to talk at the event."

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Silentassassin reads the poster and memories of his loss by judges decision in semis in the last competition he was in flood back. He remembered bloodying that judge after finding the deciding judge was bribed.
S.A was crowned leader of the streets for a,brief time. Perhaps this is a step to reclaiming his throne
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Ginger appeared from the crowd, with a bruised face and busted, bloody lip. He was injured, but had high spirits. Having recently decimated the children from the nearby school district. Ginger was honed in and ready for further violence. Sniffler’s Boxing Competition, “Brawl for Fall” would be the perfect showcase of his talents. 

"Count me in, boss. If 80 of the finest K12 students couldn’t take me down, these chumps will have no chance. Just go ahead and cancel the event. Declare me the WINNER and save us all the time and effort!" 

Ginger paused for effect. Letting the crowd's boisterous Ooh's and Aah's resonate. 

"On second thought, let them come. I take and will take on ANY challenger in the ring." As my good friend once said, “I’m the big buck of this lick. If any of you want to try it, come on and whet your horns.” 

Ginger wiped the blood away from his face with his sleeve and flicked the blood towards the ground. 

"Now, if you’ll excuse me. I’ll be with the medics." 

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Diva the chiropteran queen has heard news of a boxing competition back at the HQ since it was all that everyone was talking about and those among them was SilentAssassin who also was entering as well. She loved the sight of blood as well and the thought of a fight was thrill for her as she looked over at SilentAssassin and they both agreed to enter together. Making their way to the sign up sheet Diva looked at her friend with a smile.

"May the best person win" as she glanced at her friend.

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With a fresh black eye from his recent fighting at the Las Vegas Fight Club he walks up and speaks softly

"My record is 0-1 so hopefully this will be my turn around"

He smiles as he turns around to leave

"Get it, turn around?"

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Yaveo pressed forward. Standing at six foot three inches he towered over many of the spectators. His frame wide and his smile wider. He loved combat of the one on one kind. He noticed the people around seemed pretty jazzed up to but more than anything they were about to be placed in competition with a man who loved the feeling of making his fist advance into someone’s face. Training many years as a boxer, Yaveo spent hours of time in the gym. 

Hello Sniffler and thanks for putting this tournament together. I would like to toss my name in the bucket for the fights themselves but I would also be very open to commentating.

Yaveo leaned into the crowd staring into the eyes of the gathered.

I am not interested in just winning the tournament for the prizes, I want this championship belt to be forever at the dining table of my descendants so future generations will remember me as the one who broke the faces of many. 

Some people’s faces started to show a strange reaction to what he was saying. It seemed more intense than a friendly sparring match. Yaveo was certain that he would be a tornado of punishment in the ring throwing punches in bunches until any opponent before him would succumb to the onslaught.

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Substance had been told of the competition and thought he'd head down to the gathering to see what all the commotion was about. And there was commotion. And a lot of it. He pushed his way past the throng and caught the eye of his boss. 

"Sniffler! Look man, I didn't catch a lot of the small print but I'm told there was some form of competitive violence going on here and you are running it? Anyway, I'm told I'm into that kind of thing so fuck it, yeah, sign me up!"

With a wave and a wink to his boss, he pushed his way back through the press and into fresh air. 

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Ok. I will enter this event based on popular demand for a good show. We know I got the fast fingers. We know I'll flex and drop all the punks. Sniffler, I hope you cover Keith's eyes from the slaughter I'll commit in the ring and stuff. He is too innocent for blood and splintered teeth. We should also enter DangerClose into this match. He's a pecking bird. His beak is sharp. 

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Rupert had been walking down the street reading a book when the loud shrill of Gillian's voice pierced his ears, causing him to nearly drop the book in a puddle. He scrunched his eyebrows together and muttered under his breath for a moment before sticking a bookmark on the page he left off at. Rupert got the gist of what was going on here based on the poster that had been posted. 

"Most excellent work, Sniffler, most excellent work indeed. Count this librarian in as a contender. I'll have my people send over some additional pick-me-ups for the event as well."

With that Rupert set off to the office of Perks and Gifts - he had some transfers to do. 

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Transistor, having been plagued by boxing gloves permanently attached to his hands, approached. He had tried everything to unglue his hands from the boxing gloves but nothing worked.

This seems like something I'm made for. I'd love to compete for my place in this competition.

Transistor pulls at the gloves but they won't come off. He drops his wallet and scrambles to try to pick it up repeatedly.

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After hearing the announcement, Craven thought to himself this would be the perfect competition for him to enter and take some much needed anger out on the face of a random person that would be thrown in the ring with him. Approaching the sign up desk, Craven thumped the paperwork, "I have no idea how to spell but put my name down on that paper now!" He took a blade from his pocket and sliced his thumb, allowing the blood to flow and pressed it onto the bottom of the piece of paper. The signup staff looked up at him "You know you could have signed it with the pen, right?" Craven looked back at them awkwardly, realising he may have gone a little over the top, "Well... no one can make out it was not me that signed it now, right?" He chuckled and made his way back to his car, looking forward to the phone call to confirm his first fight.

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Walking through the crowd, Professor removed his abnormally large glasses so he could look his fellow competitors in the eyes. Not seemingly impressed; he glanced over the poster that the newest Godfather had posted. He was quick to sign his name at the dotted line.


Good news, everyone! I am offering a limited time buy one get one free sale on these hands. Think you're up for the challenge? I have put at least one parallel universe in peril and I am confident that I will do the same here. You know that old saying, fear the old man in a young mans profession. With my perfectly, unblemished, undefeated record of 0-0, I wouldn't blame any fighters that decide a last minute fight cancellation is the safest bet. May the best unhinged genius win. 


Giving a nod to a few familiar faces, Professor hopped in his jalopy and made his way back to his HQ.

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Work stress, personal struggles, and the unrelenting demands of life had begun to wear me down. I was already relentless in trying to take my frustrations out at the gym.  When I entered the gym hearing the clang of weights and the thud of punching bags echoing through the air, drowned out the worries that had plagued me all day.  I would unleash my anger on the punching bag, picturing the faces of the people I started to loathe, plus all the obstacles life had thrown my way. Each punch was a declaration of strength, defiance against the challenges that tried to bring me down.

As I was packing up I saw a flyer lying on the bench.   It was the announcement of Sniffler’s Brawl For Fall with the distinguished title of World Mafia Boxing Championship. I discovered a newfound purpose.

With the guidance of my grizzled bodyguard and trainer, Dollar, I embarked on a grueling training regimen.

Evenings were spent in the gym, where my focus was on honing my footwork, learning to bob and weave, and perfecting the art of throwing jabs and hooks.

I just knew I was ready but had a rude awakening.  As I sparred with seasoned boxers, my body absorbing the punches and learning to counter, reality set in, every muscle screamed, and every joint ached, what in the hell was I getting myself into?

Dollar tried to build up my confidence.  Every night he told me how I was getting, stronger, and faster while behind my back confessing I was going to get myself killed. My family, with a mixture of pride and worry in their eyes, stood by my side as I waited for my first boxing match.  

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For the past few days, Svent had heard his customers speak of a boxing contest that was going to start soon and how excited they were to be able to see it. Their excitement piqued his curiosity so he decided to have a look at the place the customers said the terms and rules were located. 

He examined the flier closely and mulled it over. The terms were good. So were the prizes. If he entered, it would surely bring in more business whether he won or not. Plus, he was raring for a good fight.

Svent added his name to the list and then decided to join in on some sparring since he was already there. Besides, he needed to be back in the right headspace to make sure he could put up one hell of a fight.

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Starborn hears the news of the event and makes it to the streets as quickly as he could to sign up. 

Any chance I get to see the weak jabs Yaveo throws you already know I’ll take it!”

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Gordon knew his great great great grandfather was a boxing champion and apron hearing the news rushed down and looked at the poster 


“Haha you fucking idiot sandwiches Dont stand a chance”


Gordon went back to the kitchen office and sent a telegram to sniffler informing him of Gordon’s participation in the competition 

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Yaveo looks over at Starborn who was talking some trash. Yaveo listened as he remarked about some of his weak jabs.

Well you listen up and you listen real good Starborn you may have the cosmos in your name but you’ll soon experience the hardest punch this universe has ever seen! I’ll be eating your punches like I’m a black hole until I get close enough to lay the left hook of doom on you turning you into a black dwarf. You want to call yourself Starborn, thinking that you’re destined for greatness, that you’re the mega star and you can take these jabs? Well keep messing around with me and I’ll use these jabs to pummel you until you turn to Star dust!

Yaveo pressed up against Starborn. The two boxers started yapping off at one another only to be separated by fans. 

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"I'm here to shoot hockey pucks and punch people and I'm all out of hockey pucks" A confidant Shoresy said as he signed up for the boxing competition 

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