You know those days where you just come home from work.. and you're like.. meh. And you just wanna go to sleep already but it's wayyy to early, but you can't really be bothered for anything else anyway, yet you still have to finish your daily hustle before you can even start thinking about it. 

Hard times, I'm tellin' ya!

Anything I want to write about? Well..... Im pregnant and Im also getting married and its all a lot of stress and confusion. So I figured Id join back to this game for some relaxation time to escape stress, reality, and drama. So. Here I am. 

I have no idea what I want to write about. All I know is there is so much that goes into my brain and then just screws everything up in it. Like I overthink so much on a lot of things. I tire myself out some nights with it. But when you overthink, you see every angle of a situation. At least if you keep thinking about it. Keep going over the scenarios in your head. Every little thing gets taken apart. Every word said in a conversation. It can be very exhausting. Very very exhausting.

Also, pizza is hella good. And peanut butter cookies.

Yesterday I was stoked because I havent had this hustle in a long time, and here it is, so all i have to say is screw this hustle, i absolutely hate it

Summer is over, and winter is coming. I really want to travel somewhere south and enjoy more summer heat. 
The Canary Islands would be nice!

I have spent around 10 mins trying to find something to write for this horrible hustle task. Weather, army special forces, fav movie, fav comedian. It's all without any real meaning and having to do something meaningless just sucks.

What in the holy hell does it come to when people's family are not even allowed to see their family members who just had a heart attack? When does an abusive boyfriend trump a next of kin? He cant make the decisions on her medical stuff, he has literally no say, but somehow with COVID its okay for them to trump the person who does make those decisions. This is absurd.

I hate restless leg syndrome!  It is the worse thing ever. It makes me want to climb out of my skin!  Thankfully CBD seems to help a little.

I want to write about how Openboss is meanie. He keeps teasing and calling me bad!! But we have good chats about positive things so i forgive him!

Evening here, wife and kids are visiting my parents in law because her father was hospitalized.
He woke up in the morning and couldnt get out of the bed and the docotrs are saying that he had an intracranial hemorrhage.

I really have a hard time coming up with things to say. I am kind of like the quote Treebeard said in Lord of the Rings:

You must understand, young Hobbit, it takes a long time to say anything in Old Entish. And we never say anything unless it is worth taking a long time to say.

 

It takes a lot of energy for an introvert to engage and so I don’t engage unless it is worth the energy.  

Does anybody else, every now and then go through old pictures and old messages with people you don't speak with and reminisce the good old times. Wonder what some of those people are up to these days. 

Moral of story, I think.. people come and go.

I have literally made myself sick with a task I came up for myself.  I have writer's block and have to do a lot of research for something and now I am intimidated and trying not to freak out.  

Recently I started having weird ideas right, so, I had ideas like getting high/drunk and fight famous people. Smoke bunch of weed and fight Biggie Smalls, or fuck up Denzel Washington in 1 v 1 fight, heck, do cocaine and fight prime Mike Tyson while being high on something, ketamine, horse tranquilizers, who cares. I wanna beat up Mike.

I have been watching a lot series lately. So getting bored and needing some good suggestions about new ones. I watched Jungle  Cruise in the last weekend, wasn't bad.

So I have been playing in a VTM Play-by-post game and last night I spent hours writing.  It has been a long time since I got a bug to do any writing.  Unfortunately, all that writing resulted in me getting only 2 hours of sleep.  I may be regretting some life decisions right now lol. 

Who knew nerve issues suck? I get to at least learn it first hand. But I am a reading a pretty decent book and there are peanut butter cookies. So I mean it can't be terrible right? Right?